I tried suicide 3 times. Everything in my life was falling apart. I had headaches and regular nightmares about snakes and dead people. I was always tired. I became an angry person with severe mood swings. I was so lost because I could keep a relationship. I was married and lost my partner because of my moodiness. It was like I had no control. I felt like I was in a hole and just when I thought I was getting out, I felt like something just pulled me back in. Everyone thought that my problem was not really a problem- they told me it was just in my mind. I used to sit alone and then I felt like a shadow or something just passed behind me- but nobody was there. Psychologists and doctors gave me medication and counselling but they really didn't understand what I was going through. They had no idea how to help me, but they did try. I used to get body pains but doctors had no idea what was actually wrong with me. I was so frustrated that I lost all hope. I tried to kill myself. I really thought I would be better off dead. I lost my job and I felt all alone. My life was spiralling out of control and I was like standing and just watching it fall apart. I never felt so hopeless. It might sound like madness, but I actually felt like someone was sexually abusing me at night while I slept. I felt so very violated. I thank the Lord everyday that I found a book that truly explained it all so clearly to me that I almost jumped out of my skin. It was truly shocking- the things that I read in it. I was right- there was something but it was not just medical. For the first time I felt like someone knew what they were talking about. I was shocked that someone actually understood what was wrong with me. I read it and applied some basic things and in a matter of a few days, I feel like I have my life back. Two weeks later, I got a call offering me a job. Before this everything I tried failed. People, friends, would say that they will help me find a job but nobody got back to me. There were times when someone got my hopes up and then when I went in for an interview, they said, 'Sorry, we'll get back to you.' Nobody ever did. It was like something was blocking my progress. Like something was keep pulling me back into this hole.I am so happy now. I started seeing a wonderful man. I don't have these mood swings that previously pushed people away. I want to scream this out to everyone who is suffering because nobody truly can help you and I know that you start to have suicidal thoughts. Before it's too late, please read this book: Download it from www.maistry.net. It's called TAKING BACK CONTROL(DEPRESSION). It's' A BLUE BOOK on this site. i just want to help. Maybe someone reading this is thinking of taking their life. PLEASE DON'T. YOU ARE PRECIOUS.