As if endo isn't bad enough we get these cruel and/or ignorant people and doctors (mostly men) making things worse.
Do these quotes sound familiar? If they don't then lucky you.
"Just get pregnant"; "it's your fault";
"You just need to get laid real good"; "You should exercise more";
"You're depressed"; "It's in your head";
"It's because you waited to get pregnant";
"It's because of the way you live, the way you eat, etc.";
"You should pray or pray more"; "Just take some aspirin.";
"Are you feeling better these days?, What, you still don't feel better? I am surprised. (As if it is just going to go away for no reason, DUH)";
"You don't LOOK sick"; "You'll be okay"
And others who have known for awhile that you don't feel well they say some things like: "Let's go for a bike ride." or "Why don't you want to go do (whatever it is)?"; "What's wrong?"; "Why are you limping, hunching over, etc.?"; "You sleep too much."; "You're lazy."; "You are a ****r."
Then they presume to know how you feel even better than you do saying stuff like:
"You pretend like it's way worse than it is"; "It's not that bad.";
"You're faking."; "You just want attention."
GOD!!! like the pain and no longer living a real life anymore isn't bad enough......but we have to live with this kind of crap as well, including opposition from doctors, insurance companies, and Social Security disability, whose purpose is to spend our money trying to keep it from us while we go through a very long, long waiting period and jumping through hoops because we KNOW how bad it is and that we DO deserve it because we cannot work and also therefore cannot afford insurance to get medical treatment that (longshot) may offer some relief. At the least we need pain management docs and meds. (Unfortunately that's the only thing that make any difference for me.) But without insurance (which I cannot afford. I already spent my life savings trying to get better.) it has been highly difficult to even try any other treatments. (The only thing left to try is trigger point therapy and more nerve block injections.)
For those who have this disease...
I understand and hope you will find something that works for you.
For those who know someone who has this...
PLEASE be understanding, she is doing ALL she can... and then some. She is NOT FAKING it. She feels terrible and is going through the worst thing in her life. She NEEDS your support. She is not lazy or trying to get a free ride. (She has worked hard through her life and has been self suficient. Someone doesn't leave a good career and go through surgeries just to get a hand out. IT IS REAL and real painful.
Men: Imagine being kicked in the nuts...now imagine feeling that same way every second of every day for years...that's as close a comparison I can imagine.)
PLEASE Don't abuse, second guess her or abandon her. She hates to have to ask for help so offer it to her and be kind. AND, be glad that you don't feel like she does.
God bless you.