Firstly, sorry for the extremely long post! There's just so much i want to say:
I've always been a fairly anxious person. I avoid social situations and just hide in my room whenever someone visits. During the holidays i much prefer staying by myself at home rather than going out with friends. Going travelling is always a difficult task for me as i am terrified of all the security in airports and would be so worried that there was something dangerous in my bag that i had accidentally overlooked. When we went skiing, i was nervous about three weeks beforehand as i didn't want to go to lessons and have to meet new people.
Every year the anxiety seems to get worse, especially now as i just turned seventeen and there are so many options awaiting me that i just cannot take. Every day before going to school i get anxious. Every friday night before going into work i can't sleep properly, and every time i think of work i start to get nervous. I usually end up feeling like this for about an hour into my shift, and then the feeling starts to subside. until the next shift. I'm terrified of driving because of all the things i have to remember and what could go wrong, as well as the fact that that would mean getting lessons and meeting my instructor. So i don't have my learner's license yet, when all of my friends have thier Ps. I refused to go to my very first maths class this year as i was late and everyone else was already seated. I dread being asked a question in class and sit there worrying about it before it even happens so that i cannot concentrate. I backed out of travelling to India again with my family because that was such a confronting experience for me, and the thought of travelling in an unkown country makes me amazingly anxious. I can't be home alone at night as i once freaked out and just hid in a corner crying all night and am terrified that will happen again. Any kind of appointment scares me, even catching a bus or talking to a sales assistant. And picking up the phone to ring someone is extremely difficult unless they are one of my close friends. I always need time to prepare myself being any stressful kind of situation, and i continuously need "thinking" time, as my thoughts get too much.
My physical symptoms are:
-hot flashes/ followed by cold flashes
-out of breath easily
I usually always have a queazy stomache (butterflies, except much worse) but the others usually only occur when i am extremely worried rather than continuous. (though it does happen often). also i have hyperhidrosis for which i use a special deodorant, but when in a nervous state even that does not stop me from sweating (underarms and palms).
I've been to a psychologist but what he said didn't really help. Like it was good talking about everything, and how i felt, but the thiings he told me that were meant to relax me etc haven't been working.
What i really want to know is: Is this some kind of anxiety disorder? Or could i possibly be just a typical teenager and this is how i'm supposed to feel at this age? Am i overreacting? My psychologist didn't say whether i was or not. I'm so confused and scared of what i'm feeling, everyday. I'm missing out on so much, but i cannot help the way i feel.
Any comments providing insight to my situation would be gratefully appreciated
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