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Adderall Withdrawl/Dependence:I cant continue but I cant stop

Posted In: I cannot get a diagnosis. 4,866,380 Replies
  • Posted By: stpeta17
  • March 27, 2007
  • 00:19 PM

Hello. I am a miserable 21 year old female. About 7 months ago I started taking Adderall XR 30mg tablets. I do NOT have a prescription. My friend had a months worth of the prescription, didn't like it and was going to throw it away but instead I insisted I would take it and not to waste it (i lied and said i had a prescription). I took half a pill a day and within two weeks was up to 60-80mg a day. I now have to buy off street dealers and I take it every day. I screwed up and started taking this daily and now Im dependent on it. It doesn't give me euphoric feelings anymore like it did at first. Instead I have insomnia, anxiety, constant chest pain, depression, headaches, auditory delusions, slight hallucinations, and the list goes on, but however I feel like I cant function without it. I cant do anything without it, get out of bed, go to work, even to the bathroom at times!! and etc. I want to stop. More importantly I need to stop. But the side effects of withdrawl make it seem impossible to stop, especially right now with my new job. During withdrawl, I become almost "retarded". I cannot think, very slow mentally, moody, irrational, and most importantly EXTREMELY fatigued. All I want to do is sleep, with the occasional get up to go to the bathroom and eat everything in the kitchen. How long do these symptoms last? I just started a new job in which I love, and is very active. There is NO way Im going to be able to do this job and quit the drug and be that fatigued and lethargic. I become so weak and regular bodily movement becomes overbearing. Overdosing on Coffee is not going to even come remotely close to helping. (i already drink a lot with the adderall) I cant miss work, I just started there and I love it. I do NOT have insurance and have no money. Im behind on all my bills and I wont be getting medical insurance from my work for two months. Is there anything to help the withdrawl symptoms? Also Im scared of gaining weight if I quit. The only thing adderall has truly helped me with was by getting me to my ideal weight to model. Im also worried I will get in trouble, I know its illegal to take medication not prescribed. I can NOT go on like this, but with the withdrawl, I cant stop either. I have read that tapering off the drug helps, but I dont think I have the willpower. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated or even if you can only answer one of the few questions would be much obliged.

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