Discussions By Condition: Thyroid conditions

hypothyroid - ruined relationship

Posted In: Thyroid conditions 63 Replies
  • Posted By: Anonymous
  • April 12, 2006
  • 06:23 PM

My girlfriend has hypothyroidism with the following symptoms. Crushing fatigue, no libido, foggy brain, terrible memory, thinning hair, dizziness and migraines. It seems to have overcome her so slowly that she seems to simply accept it. The worst is the exhaustion and the memory. She had 1/2 her thyroid out about 16 years ago because of nodules. When I met her she seemed to be fine but about 10 months ago she started to experience the loss of libido and became quite tired. She also began experiencing dizziness and frequent occurrence of migraines and her memory seemed to worsen - it was already pretty bad but it amazingly got worse. I have researched it and I beleive the treatment she is getting is inadequate. I saw first hand the cavalier attitude her endocrinologist has. I have been gently urging her to see another doctor who will treat with Amour Thyroid. This doctor also asks "how are you feeling?" and reputedly listens to what you say. Unfortunately, my girlfriend ended our relationship. One of the last conversations we had was about her going to see a new doctor - she felt I was annoying her about all of this. I assure you I believe I was gentle and tactful in this. The good news is that she has an appointment to see this new doctor. My question is - Has anyone else experienced the ruination of their marriage or relationship due to this disease?

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  • I think its fairly common, unfortunately.I was diagnosed with hypothyroid seven months ago, and although me and my boyfriend are still amazingly, and not all that stabely (sp?) together. I hope (though I dont know for certain) that we'll make it, but there's no question about the toll it has taken.another thing to remember about a partner with hypothyroid is that chances are they are not emotionally stable or mentally clear, so what seemed to you to be gentle encouragement could easily be interpreted as nagging in the wrong circumstances, especially when this was combined with the stress the disease would have had on both of you.If you have the opportunity, although your position as an ex may not facilitate this, the book "the thyroid solution" by ridha arem would probably be worth passing on to her, or reading yourself for a better understanding of thyroid conditions, and what was going on. It has both thorough descriptions of the various effects of the diseases (hypothyroid, hashimotos, and graves) and a foundation of what to ask for from a doctor. Its not holistic, but its inteligent.I would also encourage her to continue looking even if armour thyroid doesnt do it for her. (its what I'm currently on, and has had mixed results. . beter then straight synthroid, but not quite right)there are several other options that give both t4 and t3, so if she doesnt do well on one then another might work.
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies Flag this Response
  • Thank you for that information. In addition to hypothyroidism she has been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. I'm wondering if if this diagnosis is correct. I have been reading about hypothyroidism and I wonder if her mood swings could be caused by that rather than her actually being Bipolar. Does anyone have experience with this sort of situation? She and I are still apart and I have little hope that she will call but I love her and want her to be happy and healthy.
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies Flag this Response
  • Wow! You are a dear! Wish my boyfriend was 1/4 as compassionate. We broke up 2 wks ago. Problem with thyroid is it sometimes is not well understood and people can label a person as a hypochondriac. Bless you for hanging in there for your lady. I have struggled with hypothyroid for some time now and have gained a lot of knowledge about it. I hear that Synthroid does not work well for a lot of people. I took Armour and did ok for some time but then started having the same problems-exhausting fatigue was the worst then cholesterol and triglycerides shot back up in addition to other symptons such as hair loss... I had to trust my gut instinct once again and find another Dr. as the one I had moved out of state to be near that originally helped was no longer helping. I think he just didn't know what to do anymore. When I went to the new Dr. he checked FREE T4, Free T3, and TSH levels and that showed him what I had been telling the other doc that it was way out of balance. Conversion defect of T4 to T3. Right now we are trying to get the dosages right with sustained release T3 taken 10 hours apart and separate T4. I was doing great in April but then was in an auto accident in May and got knocked out of balance-now my adrenals are tired too. I think there is a good probability that thyroid is affecting your lady's Bipolar situation as it can greatly affect a person's moods. Hypothyroidism: The Unsuspected Illness by Dr. Broda Barnes helped me tremendously. It is written in everyday language-easy to understand. Their foundation helped me with this problem originally-a sample of my urine was sent to Europe for a Dr. that was well versed to perform an analysis. They used to have a list of physicians that know how to treat thyroid. Very best wishes in your situation. Hope this helps somehow.
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies Flag this Response
  • yes this is not uncommon. My marriage ended in divorce after being undiagnosed hypothyroid for 15 years.I would be worried about the bipolar diagnosis. With hypothyroid comes acute depression, you can hear voices in your head and have sight disturbance. I know I had terrible depression even after being diagnosed. It takes time to sort the mental side of it out. I refused the antidepressants as my gut feeling, even though I believed I was going insane, was dont do this.Good luckloveBrigsxx
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • August 26, 2006
    • 07:38 AM
    • 0
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  • Hello, I can deeply symphatize with all of you. For the last six years (maybe more but didn't know) I have battled the effects of hypothyrodism, had half by thyroid removed because of cancer and now suffer from hypoparathyrodism and hypocalcemia.I have been with the same man through out all of this. He stays by my side, cared for me when I am really sick, has been exceedingly patient and loving.But the disease puts enormous strains on our relationship and love life (lack of libido). When he gets frustrated (when we can't go out) he can and will take it out on me, it's my fault I am so sick, go to the doctor, I am slowing him down, blah blah.I can insanely "go off my rocker" for short periods but yet he stays. Yes, relationships really do suffer under this silent killer of a disease. Some people can't deal with it and others can. It's just finding the right one. Hang in there.:)
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • August 30, 2006
    • 06:44 AM
    • 0
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  • Hi ...Just on a lark i put hypothyroid and divorce into google and got a lot of hits (150,000) my wife and I have been married for 6 years and for two-3 of those years I am convinced she was hypothyroid. Because thats when the bitchiness ...the hoplessness and the weight gain happened. It was finally disgnosed this last January after we had started living apartand were trying to work things out. Here is the problem I am having ...afyter she gained weight and lost hope (depression) and was very irritable to be around becuse everything upset her and she wouldn't go to the dr even though we all tried to make her ...we thought she was suffereing from depression ....anyway what happened is that we all tried to have as little time around her as possible aftewr dinner I would retreat to my office and work etc. she had zero interest in an sexual relations at all and she wasn't even interested in humoring me for 5 min which i took in stride so she says she's moving out and we all help her pack and the week before I file for divorce I sit down with her and tell her she needs to go to the dr before we end our marriage and our family because she wasn't the happy girl i had married her voice was lower and gruff and she had the roundest face you can imagine ...still I loved her I just couldnt be around her and she needed to go and get help if possible and i was in no hurry to get divorced and that I would feel terrible if it was something besides her that waqs causing these problems...she went was diagnosed and people let me tell you within 45 days she was happy and at 60 days she was dropping weight so fast you wouldhave thought she had cancer ...anyway she was back 100% and happy amnd feminine the whole package that i MARRIED . WHAT ALSO came back was her memory of us shutting her out ..and she was really hurt and mad...the problem seems to be that she doesnt really think there was any change in her demeanor since taking the pills and that she wasn't difficult to be around ...she also thinks if she moves back in with me that syhe will go right back into her depression because she has projected those negative symptoms of her disease onto me ..I caused the depression and hopelesness I caused the weight gain and if she comes back then it will happen all over again I promise you thats it I was never abusive or angry back or anything else if you would like to write her an email and send it to me that would be fantastic ...especially if it hurt your relationshps with your loved ones as well I we are just about out of time before the attorneys get ahold of her and we get a divorce that never should happen can anyone please help me rogerbaby2003@hotmail.com:confused:
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • September 4, 2006
    • 00:58 PM
    • 0
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  • am having a terrible time with mine...no one understands...am at the end of my rope...don't care bout nothing no more...can't help it...hopeless...despair...anguish...wish i had left it in there and let it do what it wanted to do...destroying all around me and
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • September 30, 2006
    • 02:31 AM
    • 0
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  • There is hope! Part of the feeling of hopelessness and feelings of indifference is because of the overwhelming fatique. Don't tolerate a so-so Dr. This is "your" life and a life worth living. What your going through can be treated and can improve with time and experimentation with meds. Everyone's immune system is like a different map of the universe. It takes time. Think of diabetics, if they don't get help they become increasingly worse. You have to take responsible actions to make yourself as well as can be. Thyroid disease does not have to be a end! It can be managed. I know. I have Hashimoto's and Fibramyalgia. Be well.
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • October 11, 2006
    • 08:27 PM
    • 0
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  • My girlfriend has hypothyroidism with the following symptoms. Crushing fatigue, no libido, foggy brain, terrible memory, thinning hair, dizziness and migraines. It seems to have overcome her so slowly that she seems to simply accept it. The worst is the exhaustion and the memory. She had 1/2 her thyroid out about 16 years ago because of nodules. When I met her she seemed to be fine but about 10 months ago she started to experience the loss of libido and became quite tired. She also began experiencing dizziness and frequent occurrence of migraines and her memory seemed to worsen - it was already pretty bad but it amazingly got worse. I have researched it and I beleive the treatment she is getting is inadequate. I saw first hand the cavalier attitude her endocrinologist has. I have been gently urging her to see another doctor who will treat with Amour Thyroid. This doctor also asks "how are you feeling?" and reputedly listens to what you say. Unfortunately, my girlfriend ended our relationship. One of the last conversations we had was about her going to see a new doctor - she felt I was annoying her about all of this. I assure you I believe I was gentle and tactful in this. The good news is that she has an appointment to see this new doctor. My question is - Has anyone else experienced the ruination of their marriage or relationship due to this disease?I have. I have finally been diagnosed with Central Hypothyroism also known as Seconadary Hypothyroidism due to the pituitary gland and/or the Hypothalamus. My symptoms came on real slow too. My 1st symptoms was that I was extremley fagtiged and exhausted. I was not treated for over a year after they found I had a thyriod disease. That year was the worst year of my life. I simply could not function. I was so tired and extremley lazy. I couldn't carry on a conversation with anyone just because I felt like I didn't have the energy to think. I became very depressed and had a low self esteem. I started having very bad anxiety attacks and muscle pain and weakness. I thought I was going crazy. I was always dizzy and had blackouts and brain fog. Now in my realtionship situation we were happy until I started having these symptoms I think alot of it was me. I had a real short temper anything would set me off. I just felt like I wasn't getting enough attention. I always wanted to hear "your pretty" or "I love you" really just to reassure myself because I had such a low self esteem. I was also extremly sensitive he would say the littleist thing and I would cry my eyes out for hours. I felt like he wasn't there for me. I ultimitely felt like we were just roomates and there was no feelings between us. I wanted to end the realtionship. Now that I am taking synthriod I am feeling better and starting to realize how things really went down. I think alot of it was my low self esteem and anxiety that made me distant from him in my mind. Also I never enjoyed conversation or doing anything. When you have a thyriod disease at leat like mine all of your days just seem to run together and you can;t really figure things out for your self or make discisions. Every thing is just a cloud.
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • October 11, 2006
    • 09:02 PM
    • 0
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  • Wow..that is all I can say. My finace and I have been engaged since Sept 9th, 2006. We have had a pretty rocky relationship getting to that point, but I felt the day I asked her to Marry me, would be the day we put are problems behind us....WRONG! Krista was diagnoses with Hypothyroid years ago in her previous Marriage and only recently has come to the for front of our relationship. Since I met her she has been on throid medication and I have always been on her about taking it and I really didn't have a clue what would happen if she stopped. Well shortly after the birth of our baby girl, she thought that if she stopped taking it...she would loose wieght quicker...."Women". For the last 3 months she has been complaining about a sore throat or a lump by her voice box, dizziness, loss of memory, headaches out of the blue, gaining weight, and she is loosing hair quicker than me....and we are now we are minutes from leaving eachother...I mean seriously....she is whole different character...tells me she loves me all day long on the phone, cant wait to get home and see me, but when she walks through the door...she is the devil....yelling at me, her kids, no sex drive and we used to have it atleast once a day and what used to amount to small arguments are maginified by 10. I have been telling her to get back on the medication, but with a new job and no insurrance for the first 3 months she is reluctant due to having so many hospital bills. I love her so much but am loosing my mind with her....because I know that it wasn't always like this. All in all I feel that this is a problem with many woman and goes undiagnosed.....My mother has it as well....Anyone that wants to give me any advise you can email me at fxsmit9@yahoo.com I welcome your advise and wish you all luck!
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • October 27, 2006
    • 03:48 PM
    • 0
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  • do any of you with these problems have any implants (not just breast)?could be silicone poisoning. even saline implants have silicone shells.
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • October 31, 2006
    • 03:31 PM
    • 0
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  • Gluten allergy is being linked to thyroid problems and is commonly diagnosed as such. I personally had some very real fuzzy memory problems before realizing I was a Celiac - a person with a gluten intolerance, which is being linked to everything from autism to schizophrenia. I highly recommend that people of European ancestry check out celiac.com. Many seemingly unrelated symptoms went away for me when I was lucky enough to discover my problem. Some of the symptoms sound related. Just a suggestion.
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • November 7, 2006
    • 03:51 AM
    • 0
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  • i have low functioning thyroid, just recently found out. tests are "normal" but i have all of the symptoms.found this greatly informative site.www.stopthethyroidmadness.comi've had the same relationship problems as being described here, and i do cause most of the problems. hormones mess you up.apparently alot of people are undiagnosed, and even when they get diagnosed, they're under treated. if your body has a hard time converting t4 to t3 then where's the logic in feeding it just t4 (synthroid)?many people are undertreated because the tsh tells the dr. that they're within normal range. whose normal? how did they come up with this testing?the tsh is a poor way to tell if you're having symptoms still.also, if you're adrenals are messed up that has a huge effect too. many similar symptoms as hypothyroid.anyways, i suggest that you check out that site. it's all spelled out very clearly.
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies Flag this Response
  • Wow! So sorry for everyone. I have had all of the above since 1988. Was dyagnost with Chronic Fatigue Sin. but I had a few extra symptoms than Hypo. Then I was told fibromyalga. My Tsh score is 39. Its truly crazy! The book the Thyroid Solution was informitive. I have come to the conclusion that you have to do your own research and then tell your Dr. what you want to do. I have found most Drs. pretty usless when it comes o this disease. Please excuse my spelling but my math is worse. Please dont ask me about yesterday! I did find all your info helpful, will add it to my list. nitelite
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies Flag this Response
  • hypothyroidism can be commonly mistaken for or comminly associated with Bipolar I disorder.....if diagnosed incorrectly if anyone is perscribed Lithium could really screw someone up.. good luck to you
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • August 15, 2007
    • 08:43 PM
    • 0
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  • hi everyone,He is going thru the hyperthyroid and never listens if I say to go to doc until the last moment of getting hospitalised.i’m not able to handle the situation of sickness he is going thru which is disturbing me and imp scared about the future.Can any one tell me is the life going to be miserable if I marry him ……he gets irritated if I tell him to take care and now recently he was hospitalized for the reason of acute gastric (is this pertaining to hyperthyroid) .instead of making him feel comfortable imp irritating him. Please help me in advising if I have to go on with this relation. I’m fed up seeing him going sick tooooooooooo often ,PLEASE ADVICE
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • August 20, 2007
    • 08:37 AM
    • 0
    Flag this Response
  • My girlfriend has hypothyroidism with the following symptoms. Crushing fatigue, no libido, foggy brain, terrible memory, thinning hair, dizziness and migraines. It seems to have overcome her so slowly that she seems to simply accept it. The worst is the exhaustion and the memory. She had 1/2 her thyroid out about 16 years ago because of nodules. When I met her she seemed to be fine but about 10 months ago she started to experience the loss of libido and became quite tired. She also began experiencing dizziness and frequent occurrence of migraines and her memory seemed to worsen - it was already pretty bad but it amazingly got worse. I have researched it and I beleive the treatment she is getting is inadequate. I saw first hand the cavalier attitude her endocrinologist has. I have been gently urging her to see another doctor who will treat with Amour Thyroid. This doctor also asks "how are you feeling?" and reputedly listens to what you say. Unfortunately, my girlfriend ended our relationship. One of the last conversations we had was about her going to see a new doctor - she felt I was annoying her about all of this. I assure you I believe I was gentle and tactful in this. The good news is that she has an appointment to see this new doctor. My question is - Has anyone else experienced the ruination of their marriage or relationship due to this disease?Well, i have, and in my case having been a high scorer and achiever, my memory loss decimated the entire drive in me to achieve. I wasnt able to give in enough to the relationship i was in and part of it was coz i didnt want to pull her into the misery i was in. So, here i am, single still and trying not to yield to my parents push to get married and settle down. Thats life!!rossicrucian@yahoo.com
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • August 20, 2007
    • 03:15 PM
    • 0
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  • For the past 7 years I've struggled with low mood/no energy/depression type symptoms and eventually got my GP to put me on a small amount of thyroxine - but he kept telling me my blood tests were "normal". He told me I probably had chronic fatigue which, he said, there is no treatment for. As I didn't really feel any better I thought he might be right.After trying various exclusion diets and a lot of researching and reading (when I could find the energy) I decided to try amino acids. I took 500gms of tyrosine and hey presto in about 30 minutes things began to sharpen up mentally and my energy levels increased! I've been taking one first thing each morning now for around 3 weeks and don't feel like falling asleep everywhere, don't need my usual hour long and horribly unrefreshing nap when I get back from work, I wake up ready to face the day and I don't walk about in a fog! That's just a few of the benefits.I don't know if this will work for others but it's certainly well worth giving it a try. Hope this is of some help,Bill
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • August 23, 2007
    • 11:11 PM
    • 0
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  • Hi, I was curious...how much thyroxine do u take with the amino acid?For the past 7 years I've struggled with low mood/no energy/depression type symptoms and eventually got my GP to put me on a small amount of thyroxine - but he kept telling me my blood tests were "normal". He told me I probably had chronic fatigue which, he said, there is no treatment for. As I didn't really feel any better I thought he might be right.After trying various exclusion diets and a lot of researching and reading (when I could find the energy) I decided to try amino acids. I took 500gms of tyrosine and hey presto in about 30 minutes things began to sharpen up mentally and my energy levels increased! I've been taking one first thing each morning now for around 3 weeks and don't feel like falling asleep everywhere, don't need my usual hour long and horribly unrefreshing nap when I get back from work, I wake up ready to face the day and I don't walk about in a fog! That's just a few of the benefits.I don't know if this will work for others but it's certainly well worth giving it a try. Hope this is of some help,Bill
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • September 16, 2007
    • 08:24 PM
    • 0
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  • I know this thread is old- but oh my god that is me! Everything you just described is me! I'm comforted and also shocked that it could mirror my situation so well. I'm going to get my thyroid checked. Thank you for posting this! Also, someone else posted about the attitude of an endocrinologist (sp?)- i just want to say, I completley understand. I feel like my GP (i've tried 2 and an osteopath in the last 4 months) and they are all so detached, and spend about 2 minutes with you, and never ask for details. I know there is something going on with me. I've discussed symptoms and they say it's my allergies or hormones. But no tests, no diagnosis. Nothing. And day in and day out, I'm so exhausted. I have such crushing fatigue. I'm only 25. But the thing is, i do have rheumatoid arthritis, so I know fatigue is a big issue there. But lately, the last 6 months, it's been different, and severe. i struggle with getting adequate treatment, and being taken seriously at the doctors. I have no idea why, but, i will press on and find someone who can help me. Thanks for the posts.
    Anonymous 42,789 Replies
    • October 10, 2007
    • 04:56 PM
    • 0
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