This is a long read, sorry.
I was wondering if I have HIV or AIDS, most I ever did was kiss girls and feel their breasts. I think I am naturally a paranoid person, though.
One girl who I kissed and whose breast I touched had a lot of sex and that she had an infection, something with her vagina and I THINK she mentioned something about liquid or something like that and the doctor gave her medication. I don't want to go ask her what it was or anything since I didn't have sex and shouldn't really worry, all we did was kiss and I felt her breasts. I went by a doctor like 2 months or maybe a bit more ago and he said I couldn't get anything from that. At that point in time I was really wondering if I had HIV/AIDS and I wasn't eating at all, no appetite, and then I noticed bumps on my penis, and I showed the doctor, he said it was normal which had me pretty much relieved, and I even did some research and found where they say it is totally normal. The doctor also said touching breasts shouldn't give me anything, since I asked him if he were to do a breast exam if he used gloves or what. After I went by him I was prety much relieved and started living normally, eating as usual, etc. This encounter was mid July. (When I kissed the girl, though, I think I may have had a small cut or something like that in my mouth, but it isn't what I would consider an open soar, I think, but then again I am not a doctor. It was like I had this thing but it was recovering, so it was like it had a covering, but it wasn't totally there like the rest of the gum, maybe like a thinner layer or something. It wasn't to say it was bleeding or anything like that, it felt like it was basically healed. Just putting that out there though I read you'd need to drink a soda can of saliva to be at risk.)
About 3 weeks ago, I touched this (second) girl's breasts then suddenly I had no appetite and I start back wondering if I could have HIV or AIDS which makes this worse, so I start forcing myself to eat and now I eat normally, even more than before making sure I eat is the main thing. I thought I was loosing weight which is strange for me since I don't really lose weight, it's a strange thing to say and I know it is weird so it got me worry especially after I noticed having to tighten my belt an extra loop. Also, in the period when I was not really eating, which was maybe over a week, I think i got up with bad breath sometimes. Not sure if that means anything serious. I was sick badly a couple weeks ago, but this was definately not just me, as many people in school were sick and stayed home a few days, not unlike myself and were sniffly etc. for a while after. About a week after I was pretty much recovered, I touched another girl's breasts, no kissing, just the touching and still have a small dry cough which shows less and less. I am thinking it is just remaining there from the cold before, but I also think it's about time it went by now. Of course, it was worse 2 weeks ago and now i hardly have it but it is there. I have also been sweating under my arms sometimes and I am not sure if it is COLD sweat though, which is a symptom of HIV/AIDS. I was thinking it could be that I am eating so much that I may be getting more weight and this could be causing the sweating under my arms. I, sometimes, would be sitting and then feel sweat dripping down my side, from my arms. I don't know if this is what is called cold sweating since I do sweat if I am playing a sport but it sometimes just happens.
As I stated before, I think I am paranoid since young. When I was smaller, if I were to feel something poke me in bed, I would feel it was a scorpion, which I know can kill you easily with a sting. Now, I think I am much better with it and the only reason I am making myself uneasy is because I do have some reason to think this could happen, since I have put myself in some situations where I could potentially but hopefully not likely put myself at risk of getting HIV/AIDS.
It could be psychological, I don't know. I have a girlfriend and cheated on her by touching that girl's breast. It didn't bother me to say that was the reason I stopped eating but do you think I could have felt guilty without even knowing it? Now, I am sorry I did it, I am. I'm young, 17, and I made mistakes but not nearly as bad as say, having unprotected sex or anything like that.
I've been doing a lot of reading on the symptoms and today I think I may have white spots on my tongue and a small scrape or something like that on the roof of my mouth but have no idea if it is totally normal, reguading the white spots, and if the scrape could have been there from chicken bones from my meal today. I really do worry, but as I said, I think I may have a legitimate reason to be, or not.
Two last things that also had me wondering, I went by a barber and he used a razor blade that he used for other people. I was afraid to say anything though now, that could never happen to me again. I go to another barber in any case. I talked to my grandmother who is a nurse, asked if I had any rashes or anything, and said not to worry. When he was done using it he did use some rubbing alcohol or something like that and when I got home I rubbed something as well and when I was done, checked the toilet paper I was using and it had no blood, so that would mean I wasn't cut, it just touched my skin which should ne no different than using the same phone as someone right?
I also have a school pin which gave me a good poke in my thumb and there was a lot of bleeding, I don't know if maybe it might have poked someone before and then I go on and get poked by this and bleed. Anyway, I've poured out my heart here. I really hope I have nothing to worry about. Thank you to anyone taking the time to read this and offer advice.