Discussions By Condition: Nerve conditions

Terrified.

Posted In: Nerve conditions 4 Replies
  • Posted By: Anonymous
  • December 13, 2008
  • 04:18 AM

I have been addicted to reading everyones posts for years, self diagnosing and terrifying myself every night thinking the worst. I'm a 25 year old female and my symptoms began about 3 years ago. I was a runner, running 5 miles every other day, then one day my leg was killing me and since then I haven't been able to run. I had an x ray done and they didn't find anything so I dismissed it as shin splints. But why would I still have a dull achy pain in my left leg, 3 years later? Shortly after my leg situation, I began to feel pain in all of my muscles and noticed that my hands were kind of numb. I could still do things with them but it was just this feeling like something wasn't right. Ever since I could remember, I would have weak hands upon waking... where I'd have to wait almost an hour before I could even make a fist. But this felt different, and because my whole body felt weak and kind of painful, I started to get terrified. I realized sometimes when putting my hands into my pocketbook to look for something, my hand would kind of stop working and spaz out. So I'd use the other hand. I had a general blood test done and they said I was fine, but some count was a little high, which only indicated that my body was probably fighting off some minor infection or something, so they dismissed me as a hypochonriac.
I am terrified that I have multiple sclerosis. 3 years later and my symptoms have not subsided. In fact, they've gotten worse. I now have muscle twitches all over my body every single day, and muscle jerks, I get patches of numbness, my lip or an area on my chin will go numb for a split second, where I touch it and it goes away. I have a weird rash on my upper left stomach that is a pinkish brown in color and itches sometimes, which i developed right when i got these symptoms and it never went away... it's kind of embarrasing. I don't even know if that is related. Sometimes the numbness in my hands is worse than other times, but for the most part it's always there and more severely my left hand. It's the fingers and the forearm. They just feel heavy and some mornings every once in a while I'll wake up with a terrible episode where brushing my teeth is a challenge. I don't have a lack of energy, in fact I feel jittery and hyper half the time. My most recent symptom is this shaky feeling, that I noticed 3 years ago - where i'd be sitting at the computer and realize that i was ever so slightly rocking back and forth.... now it's become more obvious and i've started to have a slight tremor, no one else notices it but i do....
i don't know why i choose to live this way, i feel like it's better to sometimes think it's MS and sometimes not think it's MS instead of finding out for sure and KNOWING it's DEFINITELY MS. I know early treatment is best, but I'm so afraid of knowing i have something they can't cure... i'm afraid i'll sink into a depression that i wont come out of. I have driven myself crazy for 3 years instead of doing the right thing and seeking a neurologist. Does anyone feel the same way or think these symptoms could possibly be attributed to anything else???? I would really appreciate a response.

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4 Replies:

  • You should really be checked for Lyme disease if you haven't already. Many symptoms that seem like MS can actually be caused by Lyme disease. The rash that you talked about is consistent. You might want to check out this website's page on Lyme disease for more info.Hope that helps some!
    amayameda 6 Replies
    • January 3, 2009
    • 11:02 PM
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  • Oh, I almost forgot. Even if it turned out to be Multiple Sclerosis, it isn't the end of the world. I know. I've done A LOT of research on MS lately because it looks like there's a chance I might have it too. I'm a 22 year old female, and I don't want to lose my quality of life either. What I've found though, is that there is hope; plenty of it. If you do have MS, medication can help you live symptom free. Most people go years without having a single episode... ONCE THEY GET HELP. MS isn't a death sentence. Think of it more like high cholesterol. It can be very dangerous if it goes un-treated, but if you get the help you need and take the right precautions, you may very rarely be bothered by it. But first, I would check out other avenues. There are quite a number of other, less frightening things it is more likely to be. But the most important part of this is that you need to find out. No matter what it is, curable or treatable, there are plenty of people out there that are going through the fear and uncertainty you are. And there are many others that have already crossed that bridge and offer open arms of support.
    amayameda 6 Replies
    • January 3, 2009
    • 11:15 PM
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  • Oh, I almost forgot. Even if it turned out to be Multiple Sclerosis, it isn't the end of the world. I know. I've done A LOT of research on MS lately because it looks like there's a chance I might have it too. I'm a 22 year old female, and I don't want to lose my quality of life either. What I've found though, is that there is hope; plenty of it. If you do have MS, medication can help you live symptom free. Most people go years without having a single episode... ONCE THEY GET HELP. MS isn't a death sentence. Think of it more like high cholesterol. It can be very dangerous if it goes un-treated, but if you get the help you need and take the right precautions, you may very rarely be bothered by it. But first, I would check out other avenues. There are quite a number of other, less frightening things it is more likely to be. But the most important part of this is that you need to find out. No matter what it is, curable or treatable, there are plenty of people out there that are going through the fear and uncertainty you are. And there are many others that have already crossed that bridge and offer open arms of support. I would suggest that you go to a doctor instead of scaring yourself half to death.
    Freddd 3576 Replies
    • February 4, 2009
    • 00:31 AM
    • 0
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  • I have been addicted to reading everyones posts for years, self diagnosing and terrifying myself every night thinking the worst.I have driven myself crazy for 3 years instead of doing the right thing Not to burst your bubble or anything....but all of your symptoms may be the anxiety you feel surrounding all of this. Anxiety can cause all kinds of actual physical symptoms-- it is not something to be discounted! See a neurologist. Check out the findings, and deal with the anxiety and see what happens. There's no good use of worrying about some random disease you might not even have-- that worry can produce symptoms. Chances are that if your blood work is normal and no one but you can see the tremors....well, they might not be from a disease. I'm not trying to invalidate your feelings, I believe that you truly feel these sensations and I empathize with that totally. However, until you go through the diagnostics, let's leave the suspected illness up to the docs, okay? An MRI or spinal tap can rule out MS definitively. I know, my mom died from it (in the 80's, before they developed better meds for the disorder). I have MS-like traits, but I don't have the disease.
    Harmonium 322 Replies
    • February 14, 2009
    • 04:42 AM
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