Discussions By Condition: Nerve conditions

Hardcore Depression

Posted In: Nerve conditions 1 Replies
  • Posted By: ComeBackKid
  • July 16, 2010
  • 05:37 PM

At this point in life im so frustrated but sad, this is kinda just a jist of some of the things

well ive been depressed for about 4 years now, im 19 now, it gets worse every year because theres always something more that happens to upset me alot, in public and infront of all my friends i always keep a smile on my face act how i normally do im really social and open and i have lots of freinds becuz ive been to 4 different high schools, but when im at home alone i get depressed.

i hate my life so much i use to get bullied becuase i have big ears and a big nose and life was so bad everyday, i hated gonig in public even living was bad, i started doing drugs and smoking and drinkign at the end of grade 9, i thought it might help, it made me happier form time to time knowing i could smoke weed and do exctasy and all that and make me " escape" finally in grade 10 i decided to cut all the crap with bullying, so i ended up eventually getting expelled for fights, my expulsion at my first high skool was me bringing a hammer to school in my bag and i wacked this kid across his cheek in the middle of science class.

i was then out of skool for a half a year becuz i was gonig through i dont need skool phase. then i went another high school, started growing out my hair to cover my ears after a semester we moved away from my city and now i live a half hour drive form there. now life here is fine, no one has started fights with me the year ive lived here, im 19 now and i still need one more semester in high skool so ive been in skool for like 5 years now, i absolutely hate the way i look, god doenst pity me becuz even when i straighten my hair its super curly so it tends to **** up all the time, i think my appearnace is the thing that bugs me the most, ive been 155 pounds all my life, ive never had a relationship thats lasted longer then 3 months, most of the girls ive met have dumped me with in a couple weeks,

my family is terrbile, my sisters are ok there both older they help we when they can mom is ok to my parents are old fashioned from the middle east and dont understand jack all, my dad is the worst, regardless off him knowing i have big ears he wants me to cut my hair short, hes strict and yells at me everyday, i have a half brother that he loves more and constantly gives money to, my dad doesnt even give me a dolalr a day, i recently quit my job at boston pizza becuz i ended up flipping out on my manager becuz he was speaking rudely to me, ive worked 3 places in my life, everyday i get yelled at for not having a job, over the past couple months ive been a total alcholholic drinkign everyday

and now im deciding to cut myself becuz my friend tells me it helps

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  • i hate my life so much i use to get bullied becuase i have big ears and a big nose and life was so bad everyday, i hated gonig in public even living was bad, i started doing drugs and smoking and drinkign at the end of grade 9, i thought it might help, it made me happier form time to time knowing i could smoke weed and do exctasy and all that and make me " escape" finally in grade 10 i decided to cut all the crap with bullying, so i ended up eventually getting expelled for fights, my expulsion at my first high skool was me bringing a hammer to school in my bag and i wacked this kid across his cheek in the middle of science class.Despite what people say about 'tattling', you're SUPPOSED to tell teachers and your parents if you're being bullied. Don't listen to anyone who says otherwise, they don't have a clue what they're talking about. If people start giving you flak for tattling, report them too. There are good reasons for telling people in authority about people breaking the rules. Drugs won't solve the underlying problems, and they could get you into trouble (drugs could be mixed with rubbish that's bad for your health, never mind just being dangerous anyway, not to mention they're illegal for these reasons, and cops could bust you for doing it). If you're getting seriously abused, and nobody else will help you, tell the police about it. Smashing people's faces in with hammers will also not solve the problems, you'll just get arrested and jailed if you're not very lucky. If somebody treats me like scum, I'll have no hesitation in reporting them, and I quite frankly don't care about people who would complaing about me doing this.i was then out of skool for a half a year becuz i was gonig through i dont need skool phase. then i went another high school, started growing out my hair to cover my ears after a semester we moved away from my city and now i live a half hour drive form there. now life here is fine, no one has started fights with me the year ive lived here, im 19 now and i still need one more semester in high skool so ive been in skool for like 5 years now, i absolutely hate the way i look, god doenst pity me becuz even when i straighten my hair its super curly so it tends to **** up all the time, i think my appearnace is the thing that bugs me the most, ive been 155 pounds all my life, ive never had a relationship thats lasted longer then 3 months, most of the girls ive met have dumped me with in a couple weeks,I seriously think you need to speak to a psychiatrist about all of your problems.my family is terrbile, my sisters are ok there both older they help we when they can mom is ok to my parents are old fashioned from the middle east and dont understand jack all, my dad is the worst, regardless off him knowing i have big ears he wants me to cut my hair short, hes strict and yells at me everyday, i have a half brother that he loves more and constantly gives money to, my dad doesnt even give me a dolalr a day, i recently quit my job at boston pizza becuz i ended up flipping out on my manager becuz he was speaking rudely to me, ive worked 3 places in my life, everyday i get yelled at for not having a job, over the past couple months ive been a total alcholholic drinkign everydayI take back what I said, you *MUST* go speak to a psychiatrist, ASAP. Also look into social services or something. If your father is really acting like that, and you're so depressed you're drinking alcohol every day, you *HAVE* to do something.and now im deciding to cut myself becuz my friend tells me it helpsDon't bother with this, it's not going to help you, just make more people worry about you, (and probably make your father yell more at you). Do what I said previously, instead.
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