Hello all, I'll try to be as brief as possible. I'm 18 years old and I am about to head over to college in January. I think I have ADD or ADHD but my neurologist thinks it might be Epilepsy (Petit-mal). Here's the thing, epilepsy makes a lot of sense, but ADHD makes a lot more sense to me. I'm just afraid they say I have nothing, and don't get me wrong, I'd love to be healthy but I know there's something wrong, something that will make studying and college life hard. The neurologist doesn't think I have ADHD because I graduated an honor student but let me tell you, I was only studying the last 2 years of HS and it was ***l. It was very difficult but I needed to do it because I wanted to study in USA (I'm from Puerto Rico). Is being an honor student really a good reason to completely cross out ADHD from the list?
I talk to much, sorry. Let me post a list of my symptoms.
1. I'm VERY easily distracted. It is really, really hard to concentrate on a task. For example, I stopped writing this post to do something else like 10 times.
2. I space out, A LOT. I mean A LOT. Several times an hour, every hour, every day. This is the reason why my Neurologists suspects I have epilepsy but here's the thing, my ex-bf had this kind of epilepsy and I am not like him. I go completely blank, but if I'm holding something I don't drop it, I don't twitch, and most importantly, I know I spaced out. I am completely aware of the fact that I just spaced out, but during the time I space out I am not thinking about anything. It's hard to explain but it feels like my brain literally shut down. But here's the thing, I still can hear things around me, my brain just doesn't process them, I don't think and most of the times my friends just snap their fingers in my face and say: "Hey! Earth to Nichole!" You get the point, right? :)
3. I love to read, it's odd for someone with ADD to love to read, I've been told. But here's the thing as much as I love it, I can't do it. ***n it, I try. But I get distracted or just get bored. I love reading articles everyday to learn new things but sometimes I see an article and it's like my brain REFUSES to read it. Usually it goes something like this: "No way in ***l am I reading all that..." It'd have to be an extremely interesting article for me to pay attention to it.
4. I'm bad with directions, REALLY BAD.
5. I cannot for the life of me, stay still. Sometimes I'm in front of the computer and I'll just stand up and go in a circle in my room and then back to the chair. I know it sounds stupid but...I feel I have to do it. Sometimes I just walk around daydreaming or just for the sake of moving.
6. I am VERY, VERY FORGETFUL. This is the one symptom that has REALLY affected me. I've always been this way and it shouldn't be normal for a young person to forget so many things. I forget people I've met months ago, I forget almost everything. It tends to come out as laziness, my mom would get mad for not doing something she told me an hour ago but it's usually just because I completely forgot.
7. I'm impatient, but is this even a symptom?
8. I sometimes get mad for no reason, it's really stupid. Things that should never annoy me, sometimes do. Sometimes my mom asks me something simple and I answer in a really abrupt and displeased manner. I feel bad because then she thinks I'm annoyed by her (which at the moment of the question I am) but I really have NOTHING against her or anyone. I don't know why I do it.
I'm sure I'm missing things but I've written way too much and I can just imagine someone going like "No way in ***l I'm reading all this" LOL. To anyone who did thank you so very, very much. You are amazing!
P.S. The reason why I'm so worried is because I really just want to know what it is, get medication for it, so I can continue on studying and getting good grades in college. THANK YOU ALL!
Fun Fact: I got distracted so much writing this, my session timed out. /facepalm.