Discussions By Condition: Mental conditions

teen suicide

Posted In: Mental conditions 4 Replies
  • Posted By: DADofTEEN
  • January 6, 2011
  • 10:02 PM

We have a seventeen year old daughter who has verbally threatened suicide twice and last week wrote my wife a letter reinstating this intent. From what little info we get from the counselor, she thinks it is for attention. So I took her in today for an appt. and the counselor did not even speak to me at all, but i was hoping to get some feedback on that letter my daughter wrote which was faxed to the counselor. The problem is that the counselor will not tell us anything, she is a counselor at the local hospital with a bs in phsychology, and our daughter will not tell us anything either, so my wife and i are walking on pins and needles not knowing what to do if anything, all we can do is stress out and worry which is not benifitial to my wife since she has m.s.. My question is that is this common procedure, if so how is that benifitial to anyone since it creates stress in the home for everyone. thank you

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4 Replies:

  • Teen suicide may result of the depression.and also reason of the mental disorder.have a doctor advise in this condition.
    DONALD ARCHER 6 Replies
    • February 8, 2011
    • 06:45 AM
    • 0
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  • Well, my friend, that is how it is. The procedure is very common, and we can not change it. That is how by law, mental profesionals have to do. And, after our kids turn sixteen, the world is all theirs. Once they are eighteen, we are completely out of their picture. Appearantly, we created our kids problems, so we have to be dealing with their way of showing it. Kids these days are nowhere close to what we had been at their age. They are overly sensitive. Computers, TV(s), video games did their way of parenting our kids. We allowed it to happen. We bought them all of that. Even if we are sick, it is our problem, not our kids problem. We are parents, we brought them to this world, so ultimately, we have to deal with our decision. The decision we made: to have kids. As they could not choose what parents to have, we can not choose how our kids are going to turn being. We can try, but if they do not want to follow our wishes, it is not their fault. Anything they do good, we have to keep praising them constantly. If they did something bad, we are not suppose to criticize them for that.You can try asking your daughter how was the meeting with her counselor, but if she does not want you to know, you will not know. If your daughter does not want her counselor to tell you anything, than her counselor can not tell you anything. By law. Although, you have right to request family meeting with your daughter beeing there. But it might happen, might not. You might end up sitting with her counselor only along with your wife, and her counselor might not tell you anything concrete about what 's going on in your daughter's mind.So, what you have to do is to learn how to become a politician with your own child. You gotta become extremely good to her, in order for her to maybe start opening and saying litlle by little. See if you can become a friend of her friend, just to find out that your daughter calmed down and that suicide is not on her mind anymore. Do not put any of the words in her friends mouth, just ask if they had some fun, and how was their day in school. I understand your frustrations, since I am dealing with two grown up "teenagers". The cool way is to act like everything is normal. Maybe that will get someone to open talking.
    leftandright 4 Replies Flag this Response
  • The professional needs to maintain the trust of your daughter if therapy has any chance of helping her hence why they arent going to tell you what is being discussed etc. They also may have legal obligation to do so too due to her confidentality.. I personally thou think they should be obliged to share her diagnoses thou with you as her parents she is living with.. has she a personality disorder??? depression or what? I think it is poor of her therapist to not be trying to reassure you thou if she's not at risk and they should be telling you to keep an eye on her if she is.
    taniaaust1 2,267 Replies Flag this Response
  • Let me add this into the mix, being as my Wife attempted suicide last year having had a steroid induced Manic episode followed by a deep depression. DON'T ever subscribe to the theory that those who talk about it never do it, or that talking about suicide may be a cry for attention. It may actually be the case however if I can help anyone from my experience (and luckily my wife is still with us and survived unscathed from a very serious attempt (4 times the lethal dose of an anti-depressant), the help I would give is take it seriously. Any discussion about suicide means that the person is having thought about this - however serious those thoughts are. Also I don't subscribe to the view that all parents are to blame, lots of kids today don't have suicidal thoughts. I believe there are underlying causes of this which could be psycho social but could also be chemical or biological. And the last piece of advice I would give is don't take anything the therapists or psychiatrists say at face value, they are all just guessing like the rest of us, the human brain is very complex and everyone reacts to treatments in different ways. Fight, Fight and Fight again with the doctors, do everything you can but never take your eye off the ball, after a while it becomes second nature. I really sympathise with your situation and don't think it is all your fault, if it is then it is and it is done now, just deal with the here and now, chances are though unless your are a really bad parent (which I don't believe otherwise you wouldn't care enough to ask for help) then it isn't your fault, it just happened - really it does just happen sometimes - computers go wrong enough and the human brain is far more complex. Good luck and I'll think of you when I am sleeping with one eye open.
    harveya 4 Replies Flag this Response
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