Hiya. I'm 17 years old and I don't know what's wrong with me. All the time I wish I was dead. I have extreme self-esteem issues and I'm often unbearably sad. I realize that I'm in good circumstances, my family is good and fine. Yet, all things considered, I hate myself and I'd rather not ever have existed.
The depression isn't consistent, I don't think. I don't know if I should call it depression, though. I have bouts of extreme sadness where I just break down and go to sleep because I can't do anything else, but then there's times like these, where I'm content at the moment. Not upset, but still wanting to be dead.
I'm confused, I don't know if I'm explaining this well. Basically, I always wish I was dead, even if I'm okay at the moment. What should I do? Will it pass or do I have to grow up or something or what?