Discussions By Condition: Mental conditions

Please Help!!!!

Posted In: Mental conditions 1 Replies
  • Posted By: Mystic_Rain
  • May 7, 2007
  • 04:51 PM

I would like to know if anyone has any advice for me. my doctor has reciently diagnosed me with an alchol dependancy and boderline personality disorder. I am very suiciadal for reasons i am not sure of. I had a very tramatic childhood. now i feel like my world is falling apart. It seems that i have these brief periods when life is going good and by this i mean im happy, i can function in society, i can consintrate at work, then i snap, i do things i normally wouldnt do ( example: i was totally against crack and anyone who did it. I helped my younger brother kick his addiction. only to last summer start doing the highly addictive drug myself) I was not happy with my actions and i cant pinpoint why i choose these very risky options. This is just one example of many more high risk behaviors that i have chosen over the past 9 years. Then i go through this period when i build myself up, i straighten myself out, i get a good job, things look good for a few months, then bang downward i spiral, ill start feeling depressed, unhappy with my life, the scary thing is its getting progressively worse. i was hospitalized last october for a suicide attempt, the doctor really didnt care about anything i told her, i actually had to have a nurse come in my meetings to tell her that something really was wrong. She was nice enough to put me on serequel and tell me that i had bipolar. i was attending interation groups and things seemed to be going well so they sent me home. when i went to my follow up appointment she said she wasnt sure what was wrong with me, i didnt need to go to the interation group, i just need counciling. so i went to councling things seemed fine then one night while staying at my moms i went to go and buy cigerattes at midnight the next thing i remember was like i was waking up and i was downtown standing at the bus stop and it was 11 in the morning the next day. My mother lives several miles from downtown. I had flashes that i stabbed someone and swore i could see blood on my hands and clothes. I took the bus home and my boyfriend took me back to the hospital. My doctor was on holidays and another filled in, he said i was having a psycotic episode and put me on effexor and respiradone. i was there for two weeks when i was sent home, that night my jaw locked and went to the emergancy where i was given a shot, i was instructed by my doctor to go off all medictaions. I felt fine and nothing was really discussed. The pattern of the ups and downs started again and i felt completly screwed up, i became very suicidal, i cut my wrists to the point i needed stitches they sent me home. Then this last time i took my moms heart medication. they sent me to a different hospital and i hoped that this time i could get some real help. I was let down again. The doctor told me that i didnt have bipolar that i had a substance abuse problem and borderline personality disorder and anxiety ( this she got in the ten minutes that i talked to her) i was only admitted for the weekend i was put back on effexor because i thought it worked and she asked me what i thought would help me. I started the medication That thursday, friday i went to my moms birthday party at 11 i came home but was feeling very confused and dizzy my boyfriend wasnt home and had the keys to the house. i stayed im our old truck in the back of the house until sunday morning when he came home. i slept most of the time felt to confused to walk back to my moms or to even call someone for help. i also didnt eat or drink. i slept all sunday and most of monday to. I can recall very little of the weekend and feel like a day is missing somewhere. i chose to go off the effexor after that. now i am starting to have this feeling of something bad happening, this impending doom. i am easly startled, my heart starts racing. I dont understand why all this is happening to me. things seem like there getting worse.
It would be appreatiated if anyone could offer any advise because i dont understand what is happening to me and doctors dont seem to be doing anything. Ive diagnossied by three different doctors all with three different diagnosis. As for the medications that i have been given, I feel that they have made me worse, or have done nothing.

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  • I responded at your other post, http://forums.wrongdiagnosis.com/showthread.php?t=14607 - I'll repeat it here:Your whole post tells me that you are sane, and a wonderful person. I do know some psychotic people over here, and I agree that by this time, they need their meds. I was bipolar and psychotic at one time, but I just needed mystical insight, which fortunately I was given, timely and good enough for me. You will not find a psychiatrist with mystical insight, and it appears you will not find a doctor that knows which physical imbalances may be adding to your problems.It could be as simple as hypoclycemia (low blood sugar). Try this: through the day, every hour, eat a bit of cheese and about 15 raisins - always protein and carbs together. Never eat much, but frequently. In between, snack on peeled apples, only a quarter at a time. Eliminate ALL simple sugar, artificial sweeteners, processed foods, sweet carbonated drinks, candy etc. In 3 days you will feel better and have less bipolar. Add homeopathic Resque Remedy or Nervuton, Vitamin-B12 (complex), Omega-3 (salmon oil) and of Vitamin-C take 1000 mg (slow release).I'm impressed with a site I found, www.westonaprice.org/askdoctor/ - I recognise easy tips there that I've been told but have forgotten again. Such as fermented bran, the secret of many healthy Africans. Be sure to read this one: www.westonaprice.org/soy/complaints.html whole page (!) and elsewhere http://thyroid.about.com/cs/soyinfo/a/soy.htm .. There is a lot of soy in commercial bread and many other products.Psychiatry is like jail, it merely maintains totally lost cases. You need not be lost, you can decide to be sane. Even the worst psychotic or schizophrenic can decide that, if they wanted to. In practice though, if we don't want to, we can't. We need a better reason than fear. Dr Ronald Laing discovered that if you treat them right, they can be sane. Problem is, society will not treat them right. You started well, but were disheartened.One way to obtain support is to read. Begin with the book "A Course In Miracles (ACIM)" - bookshops know it well. Don't believe it is difficult, just read. And you are correct about impending doom, there is a traumatic polar shift on the way. This only happens every 3657 years, and the previous one was not so severe. Try to live long enough that you may experience this adventure. Many people will go insane then, and will need your help.Please, also read posts 4 and 5 in this thread: http://forums.wrongdiagnosis.com/showthread.php?t=11185:D
    Curly Stooge 319 Replies Flag this Response
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