I am a new user. Came across this site while i was googling..
I am not sure if anything is wrong with me. I always feel pathetic/silly about bringing stuff like this up (hence i do not discuss with people and have not seen anyone about it). However, it affects my life, and i need some clues.
Information about me that may be appropriate:
-I grew up in another country, had to leave when i was around 10 because of unfortunate circumstances. And now reside elsewhere. I am now 18. (moved country about 3 times).
-I am now in university, studying Engineering. So i am relatively intelligent.
-I am fit and generally healthy. I go to the gym a few times every week.
-I don't do drugs or smoke. I drink only occasionally.
-I drink a lot of tea. But that is good for me, right? :P
What is bugging me:
-I am always tense and have no enthusiasm for anything.
-Clouded mind. I feel as if i can never think straight. I overlook things when in this state (which, i think, is all the time.)
-I zone out a lot.
-I over-think absolutely everything.
-I am OCD about things. For example: Before i go to sleep, i have a big routine. I switch off the kettle, make sure the doors are locked (twice), brush my teeth, check my blankets for spiders, move my bed to check walls and ceiling for spiders, and i lie in bed listening for unusual noises until my mind starts wondering over random things.
-At my little part time job, i have trouble listening to customers, listening to instructions from my boss and am clumsy sometimes and can't help it. and it all builds up, my mind becomes more clouded until i am pretty much on a "bad auto pilot".
- On this "bad auto pilot" i talk, but cant seem to say the right things, and sentences sometimes get cut off completely or my voice lowers or gets higher.
-I bite my nails (bad habit that i do not have the willpower to stop)
-My hands shake a bit, all the time.
-I get stressed over little things. I went out for a drive with my mother (as i have a driving test soon). I can't concentrate properly when driving, i go onto this "bad auto pilot" and get extremely stressed and anxious.
-I don't feel like myself, i am constantly changing my ways, act and feel differently every day, and around certain people without being able to help it.
-I never accomplish tasks when i set them for myself, i procrastinate until the last minute. I get stressed and look for excuses.
-I make impulsive decisions. e.g. I bought an expensive racing bicycle that i never use. And recently, a new computer (Oh gosh.. More distraction :| ...)
-I am extremely easily affected (maybe too much so) by music.
Can't think of anything more at the present time, I have lost concentration.
A little help would be greatly appreciated.
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