I often think about suicide but I don't think I have every truly wanted to die. I don't believe I need to see a psychologist and I don't really want to. Often these thoughts have gotten me close to making some really bad decisions. I have tried to overdose several times but without success. I lay in bed and wait to see if something bad will happen, I go to sleep and I think maybe I won't wake up, I obviously I wake up and then I go about my daily business as if nothing has happened. No one knows I have ever felt this way or attempted to hurt myself. I feel fine afterwords, sometimes I feel stupid for ever trying such a thing or thinking such a thing. After such attempts I usually tell myself I will never let it happen again but the thoughts have always come back. I don't feel depressed, I really don't. Sometimes these thoughts happen even when I feel great. Sometimes, when I am a little stressed I will think about it more but not always. I do occasionally have mood swings but they aren't severe. I will feel really bad for a day or two and then I am over it and it's back to normal. I feel like my mood changes are just normal ones and none of my college friends or parents have ever noticed anything out of the normal. I know thinking about self harm isn't right and I don't know if maybe there is something wrong or if I just need to practice better self control?Reply Follow This Thread Stop Following This Thread Flag this Discussion
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