I am 21. I (think) I am having problems thinking, but I can't be too sure, as obviously I can't know exactly what other people think - or more to the point, how other people think!
Basically, I don't think much. Without any stimulus/distractions I can sit still for a very long time and not a single solid, specific thought will pass through my head. I feel emotions (I have just recently fallen in love and can sit and think about the person - but will not think of anything in particular. It will just be their presence in my head). I can be quite intelligent despite all this. I am generally quite depressed.
My thoughts do not really occur as words (as in specific spoken sentences), and I don't really get distracted and think off in tangents: "Oooh, I think I will go to the shops and then I will go and pick up some bread - oh, bread... the loaf I had last week was so good... I ate it with my family.. oh I wonder how dad is going... blah blah"
My head is pretty much numb. I have trouble concentrating on tasks. Sometimes I can be incredibly witty/humourous in conversation... I know what to say and can just be fun to talk with. Other times I feel too stupid/blank to think of anything to say. I don't/can't really plan details things for the future.
I've spoken with my mum a little bit about some of these things. She says she envies me and that she and thousands of other people meditate to obtain what's in my head (or lack there of) - that the absence of chaotic thoughts would be 'peaceful'. It's not. It's numb and boring and quite frightening. Sometimes I feel like an empty shell of a person.
For a few years I worked in a string of extremely "mind-numbing" jobs where I started to notice I could just sit there doing absolutely nothing (and think about absolutely nothing) and could pass entire days that way. I don't do that sort of work anymore, but I don't do anything that could be called mentally stimulating either. I get stressed when tasks start to accumulate (even though realistically it might only be one or two very small and simple tasks).
...anyway. I might stop here (I may have trouble thinking but it doesn't look like I have any trouble writing right now!)
So, any thoughts, anyone???
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