I have a few kind-of-funny things to run past you all! It's poorly organized- I'm sorry about that. I originally had bullets but they weren't well organized either, so I just smushed them all into one paragraph.
I fit in fine with my community and society and such, but I study up first: eg. I researched how to make out before I did that for the first time. I use a textbook to go over more complicated interactions. Basic things I learned... I think through conscientious observation, which is a little weird isn't it? I mean most people learn that stuff just as part of going through their lives. I definitely didn't pick up on most social interaction stuff until late elementary school. Actually, sometime at the end of 5th grade. On the last day of school, my teacher hugged all the other girls goodbye... but she didn't hug me. That's the first thing I noticed. That's about the time I started paying attention in school, also. Previously I was constantly daydreaming (the logistics of getting shipwrecked; how much money it would take to buy a horse and build a place to keep it). In middle school my daydreams became more imaginative and I had more normal interactions... calling boys who liked me gross and such. I'm hypersensitive to sounds and smells. smells frequently make me nauseous and semi-loud or sharp or deep sounds are just very uncomfortable. I'm bad at eye-contact. And I scrunch up my face and nod frequently in conversation, but then I realize I didn't actually understand what they were saying like my nod suggested when they keep talking. I remember everything, but I have blackouts where I know I can't remember anything that happened even though I know I was fine at the time. I'm uncoordinated, but this might be because I am left handed and was taught to do everything with the right. I pick at the bumpy parts of my skin when I'm bothered, but it's because at those times I notice they are not uniform. I'm terrible at math. I'm good at math if I have an example in front of me that is even remotely similar to what I'm working on. But given an equation on my own I can't do it. I get confused by the sentence structure and which order the steps go in and such. In 5th grade I spent half my recesses inside trying to learn long division (I still can't do it. but I can use a calculator)... the other half I spent on the swings. In the same vein I have trouble with diagrams and such. I like to use tables, but I can't look at one and understand it. I have to 'read' it and add words in my head. this gets difficult for long charts with many parts.
my main thing is I feel like I should automatically know how to interact in social situations but I don't feel capable until I do research on that specific interaction (if it's new) first.
nevermind, I seem normal to me. maybe it's just an anxiety issue that makes me want to do that. I was thinking maybe some supermild aspberger but that doesn't exist.