My best friend is 39 yrs old an now suffering from a type of depression as a result of sexual abuse, that is one of the major reasons i feel certain about as I am a victim myself. He was a young 16 year old, and i must add has a disability too. Before the abuse started he had recently lost his father to lung cancer, a devastating affect. His mother and grandma suffered with clynical depression. After 7 years and a suicide attempt his mums saviour was lythium. Then his brother died of lukeimia at the age of 39. He started abusing alchohol and has lost everything he owned. 4 years ago he moved back home to his mums house and since then his manifestations of abuse, grief self worth self awareness are very much in control. My main point of shairing this story is, im looking online to tell me what type of depression or maybe mental illness, clynical i dont know, but he started to wet himself, soil himself, not washing at all not eating. But quite happy to go to the shop and buy his 8 cans of lager and ***s.
It has taken 4 years for him to accept he is unwell and agree he needs and wants help. We are now waiting for a medical team to assess his needs.The wetting had to stop that day he agreed to get help.
I asked him if he would like to come to my home to hava a bath. His clothes were drenched in urine. He felt embarassement. I asked him what explanation does he give to himself for sitting in the urine, he replied his sins. I explained that sins is such a small word for the velocity of his demons and to urinate and sit in it means he accepts that word sins is enough for him to excuse to himself, when i explained that sins can he forgiven and he has not committed any at all, so the word is not sins i told him he is sitting in the manifestation itself. From this chat that we had he made the decision not to wet himself and has been 3 days so far, i wanted to throw a party but i realised it wasnt my reaction he needed. He knew it was the right thing to do for himself. But obviously that is the only improvement he has made for himself coz i have explained that the doctor said his wetting is not a medical condition. But he is aware and agrees that he needs help with his mind.
This person i speak of is a remarkable person, before he started to wear his depression on the outside as well as inside, he was able to brighten your day even if you had flood lights in your eyes.
I am a survivor of child abuse and know thats bad enough for one to endure, but it took my fathers death to break the strength that i thought i had and would carry me through my life. Counselling was forced on me thankfully, and now know when i am not considering myself, two words so easy to say but hard to shout out. WHAT ABOUT ME! WHO CONSIDERS ME
Sorry if ive confused anyone but thank you for takng the time to read this mixed up message. I will be interested in any advice because, gratefully, there is always something to take from it good or bad.