I am 21 years old and i have been living with this condition for 2 years now. it happen when i was under the influence of meth (the doctors said that meth didn't cause it but certainly did not help and also just to let you know this event scared me from ever doing it again.). i was extremly emotional state at the moment and i was thinking about painful memories from my past. i was also drwelling on how i was going though a tough break up at the time and i was also a young and fustrated business owner whose business was not functioning like i envisioned ( hey its not easy). then without warning i felt an extreme pain on the right side of my head, above my ear about maybe 2 inches.the best way to describe this pain is that it felt like an explosion inside my head. i droped to the floor immedietly and grabed my head and started to cry.
when it first came on half my face felt funny, it didn't feel numb(i could still feel) and it didn't feel paralyzed( i could still move all the muscles) but it felt differant. i still to this day feel this. another thing that i remember is how the right side of my brain felt bigger, as if swollen, than the other side (this has gone away though and i don't notice it any more). it was extremely hard to maintain a train of thought. in fact i remember an instance where i was in so much pain that all i could do was stare at a wall and try to focus on a small dot that was on the wall. another thing is my ear and my eye on the right side were in pain or didn't feel normal. also on the right side of the head it feels extremely conjested. i went to the doctor the next day and he begain treating me for migrains and said that and gave me anti depressants, pain killers, and medician to treat migrain condition. however none of these had any effect. the only thing that i have noticed to have any effect is ice packs and sleep. i have not found a single medication that had any positive effect. within the next few months i had a CAT scan which came back negative for any abnormalitys. i had blood work to check for any syndoms and red flags. my blood pressure is though all this has been always good. i also had my sinus X-rayed. right now i am currently going to a nerologist however he is treating this like a migrain and i have little faith in any results from his treatment.
i am at the end of my wits with this. i feel like i am going crazy and on my way to going into madness. i am still able to work and i am in college still full time. however i cant do it like i use to and everything has become a struggle to me. i am in pain and feel sick nearly every minute of every day. sometimes it is not so bad and is manageable. other times it is so bad it is almost like i am temperary disabled. my grades have droped to B's and C's. they use to be A. i have a great job but it is so hard getting through the day to day grind. i feel like i am almost sub human now. i am now subconciously scared of social situations and i have notice my self becoming more and more alienated from others and tend to be anti-social. i havn't been in a serious relationship since the incident. every woman i have been with since then has been a short relationship where i have been unable to open up( because i know they won t understand and probably don't want to be with someone with my health problems) and i have been finding ways out the relationship.
i feel like i am half the man i use to be. i no longer dream about doing acheiving extravigant goals anymore, i now dream about one day being normal. i am a proud man and always have been. it hurts me very badly when i hear people who use to say that "zack you are so smart", start saying that "zack you use to be so smart". i use to have so many people who believed in me and have told me in a very serious manor that i was going to do something great someday. they don't talk like that any more.
if someone could give me another possible answer to my problem. i am so desperate for an answer. i've looked on the internet for hours and i can't find any thing that is concrete and not vauge or irrelavent. ive see so many doctors all they have gave me is false hope. i want to move on with my life. even though this situation is very bleek i refuse to give up. i don't want to be or be treated like a cripple.
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