Going into my fourth year of this hellish existence, I am constantly , I mean constantly, surrounded, hovered, attacked, invaded by these tiny barely visible things, almost like a dot of dust. I no longer mention my affliction to the medical community as it is simply not in their textbooks and or are too busy for my 'nonsense'.
I got my fill of ridicule, went along out of desperation with the scabies diagnosis, treatment, even the delusional one with all the trimmings of psych care, RX etc. , I did not care anymore as long as I got some attention, however, no one takes time out to listen to me, really listen and LOOK at me, with a few minutes of sitting still next to me, a simple magnifying glass and I can prove my hellish affliction.
I spend thousands of dollars on environmental and personal treatments.
One wishes to be attacked by a huge animal, have bite marks to show for, picture perfect bug bites, anything of face and 'medical textbook value'. but not this, these things are merely blending in, by color, (beige-grey) and almost translucent, quick moving and hide well in any speck of paper, textile and of course skin, hair and body cavities. It is a grueling existence to realize that is my live now. never, ever to sit on chair, lie on a bed, put on some clothing without knowing that there are gz illions of these at various developing stages, if these things are so tiny, the larvae are measured in nano means, etc. I am tired, I try to pretend to live a fairly normal life, hoping someone will notice them as well. Most people are too busy, distracted, just notice a lot of sneezing and scratching around me.
I did not notice them at first either, just knew that my sinuses were congested, got lots of brownish spots on my skin at various sites, see pulsation at various sites, my veins suddenly engorge and then suddenly totally flatten out, after four years I finally realize these things are targeting me or other microbes in me. (which is the principle of decomposition), abarrancy in my case?
Now I can make out their outline, their long thin appendages, either all curled up or straight, almost a tiny spider like center, I see them coming out of my pores, my left eye was affected for a long time, after salt and baking soda sinuses rinses, I get huge long stringy discharges, tough to separate. I see biofilm formation on my hands, feet and breastbone. When I scratch I see them emerge, when left alone, it is merely a dark speck for most part. I have the occasional itching, bites and 'stiring' sensation, the symptoms do not matter anymore, the fact that these things live off and in me, Does.
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