I am a 50 year old man, married for 28 years. I love my wife and she loves me, but my sexual problems are causing a very big strain in our relationship. I need to find an explanation of what is causing it
Sex was a very important part of my life and it was great until 6 years ago (I was not yet 44 then), when I first started to experience erectile difficulties, then shortly after total loss of sex drive, and now I have zero desire for sex, not even masturbation. I tried watching **** as an experiment - I have no reaction at all. Feels like sex just totally cut out from my life. I do have night erections however, which seems to indicate that it's not a problem of blood flow.
I have done extensive research on this and closed out many of the factors that can contribute to my condition. Of course ED is common, but it seems like most of the time it's caused by things that I don't have.
I am not taking any medication.
No cardiovascular problems.
No difficulty with sleeping.
Not clinically depressed.
No alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, minimal caffeine.
Doctors checked my testosterone levels repeatedly, sometimes it was at the lower end, but within normal range. I tried testosterone replacement therapy with injections for 6 month - no change. Some time later I tried it with Andro-gel also - again no change.
Tried Viagra/Cialis/Levitra. These work to a certain degree, but I got severe side effects, especially from Cialis. And of course they don't do anything for the diminished libido part.
I have seen doctors, urologist, endocrinologist, psychologist, sex therapist, acupuncturist, naturopath - so far no diagnosis or treatment.
This problem of course is extremely frustrating for me and my wife. She feels hurt and rejected. She thinks if I would have a medical diagnosis, (for example if I would be diabetic), it would be easier for her to accept it. Without this, she still has a feeling that I just don't desire her.
So it's a combination of chronic, long term low libido with ED - I have a feeling I exhausted all resources. I haven't found anyone with the exact same combination of problems . I need an answer...