Discussions By Condition: Male sexual conditions

Gets errections but can only climax once...

Posted In: Male sexual conditions 7 Replies
  • Posted By: Anonymous
  • March 10, 2009
  • 05:55 AM

I have a question that no medical or psychology sites have been able to answer.

My husband can get an erection just fine. He can even climax, but he can't climax more than once in 24 hours although he still gets another erection. I realize I am lucky, but when you consider the minimum we'd have sex in a night was two times, it's a bit unnerving (at least for me) that he's now a 'one hit wonder.' His desire is there. When he gets that second erection he wants to use it but when he does…nothing more happens.

I see all kinds of posts on E.D. but this isn't E.D. His solider can 'salute' but he can only 'go into battle' once a day. If he masturbates that morning, he can't come that night. If we have sex once (and he climaxes) he'll have another erection, but then nothing 'comes' of it.

He's 38 now and he had a vasectomy about 8 years ago. He has no health issues like diabetes. He says he's not masturbating every day or anything. And it's only been in the last three years that this has been an issue. So although he has no difficulty with erection, the problem is climaxing more than once.

He said he desires me - and I'd say that's true since he can perform once a night (just not more than once, even if he wants to). Another thing is that he used to be all over me, but now I'm usually the one to make the first move (which honestly isn't often either lately because I never know if he's going to be able to 'finish' what he starts). A man who comes too soon is a problem... but so is a man who says he loves you but you can’t make him come.

Anyone else have this problem (or a solution)? I'm not sure who to approach with this...an MD, an urologist, a psychologist?

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7 Replies:

  • I have a question that no medical or psychology sites have been able to answer. My husband can get an erection just fine. He can even climax, but he can't climax more than once in 24 hours although he still gets another erection. I realize I am lucky, but when you consider the minimum we'd have sex in a night was two times, it's a bit unnerving (at least for me) that he's now a 'one hit wonder.' His desire is there. When he gets that second erection he wants to use it but when he does…nothing more happens. I see all kinds of posts on E.D. but this isn't E.D. His solider can 'salute' but he can only 'go into battle' once a day. If he masturbates that morning, he can't come that night. If we have sex once (and he climaxes) he'll have another erection, but then nothing 'comes' of it. He's 38 now and he had a vasectomy about 8 years ago. He has no health issues like diabetes. He says he's not masturbating every day or anything. And it's only been in the last three years that this has been an issue. So although he has no difficulty with erection, the problem is climaxing more than once. He said he desires me - and I'd say that's true since he can perform once a night (just not more than once, even if he wants to). Another thing is that he used to be all over me, but now I'm usually the one to make the first move (which honestly isn't often either lately because I never know if he's going to be able to 'finish' what he starts). A man who comes too soon is a problem... but so is a man who says he loves you but you can’t make him come. Anyone else have this problem (or a solution)? I'm not sure who to approach with this...an MD, an urologist, a psychologist? Hi Wondering wife, There is a significant possiblity that the answer is "aging" and refractory period. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Refractory_period_(sex) In sexuality, the refractory period is the recovery phase after orgasm during which it is physiologically impossible for an individual to have additional orgasms. It is also sometimes defined as "the time immediately following orgasm during which a man cannot achieve an erection." The penis may be hypersensitive and further sexual stimulation may even feel painful during this time frame.The refractory period varies widely among individuals and across species, ranging from minutes to days. An increased infusion of the hormone oxytocin during ejaculation is believed to be chiefly responsible for the refractory period and the amount by which oxytocin is increased may affect the length of each refractory period.Another chemical which is considered to be responsible for this effect is prolactin, which represses dopamine, which is responsible for sexual arousal. At around 38 males have a falloff in hormones as well. As males age refractory period increases. Some learning to control ejaculation would do your husband, and you, well. There are a variety of methods. A book called ESO - Extended Sexual Orgasm has all the information needed to leaqrn this skill. What are you looking for in all this. If he could help you have multiple and/or hour long orgasmic experiences that he shjares in erotic tance would that be sufficient? He doesn't need to ejaculate even once for that. He can enter into ecstatic states without ejaculating and save it for the grand finale, with perhaps a screamer of a simultainious orgasm when you are both ready to end things. What is this "2 times minimum" about, maybe 20 seconds of orgasm? You could have an hour or two or three of orgasm instead of 2 brief ones. Wouldn't 2 hours of ecstacy for both of you be superior? Why is counting ejaculations important?
    Freddd 3576 Replies Flag this Response
  • As age increase there can be this problem, but had you consulted Doctor??
    jamesprx 14 Replies Flag this Response
  • how old is your husbnad? apparently there is smth wrong with him
    Anonymous 42789 Replies Flag this Response
  • Because during adult life seminal secretion and erection are always coincident, it has always been teleologically understood that erection facilitates ejection. But such is not the case! Quite the contrary. The erection even increases resistance, because as a true function of the external occlusory muscles, the calibre of the urethra can only be diminished by the congestive swelling thus produced. Just try for once to pass urine during a strong erection!
    kamagrarx 1 Replies
    • August 27, 2009
    • 10:09 AM
    • 0
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  • My Boyfriend and I sometimes engage in sexual activity more than once a day. ... The exact reason behind your problem can only be judged by a ... The best thing you can do is to consult an urologist, get to the root ... But if you can control it, try it: you'll find you can bounce back much faster
    shoppillrx1 1 Replies
    • September 11, 2009
    • 07:07 AM
    • 0
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  • It really isn't unusual!I'm only 28 and once I've masturbated in the morning I'm thankful if I can at least get it up in the evening for my partner! She always knows if I've been 'handy' as I just don't leave my magic stuff inside her.For some men its just a way of life. Nothing particularly wrong though!
    dinky1 11 Replies
    • October 24, 2009
    • 00:41 AM
    • 0
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  • I have the same problem, my husband can only **m once in a day/nite. He gets real hard but doesn't last long the first time, I'm not done yet and havent had e. He gets hard a second time but not quite as hard and i have to wait hours later then it only lasts for about 5 min but he doesnt finish then he starts to go limp. Most of the time I blame myself that he cant perform. I have severe depression because I'm trying to cope with the fact that I will never have good sex again and I'm too young for that. I'm only 44.
    Anonymous 1 Replies Flag this Response
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