I'm a 30 yr old male who has been dealing with what doctors diagnosed as simply being a short achilles tendon all of my life. I'm unemployed, uninsured and wish to find out exactly what it is I have. My gf told me that I have similar symptoms to that of mild cerebral palsy. I had one surgery on my achilles tendon when i was six. I've never been able to fully extend my left leg and cannot reach my toes standing up without having to bend my legs. The muscles on my leg are significantly under-developed in comparison to my right. My left arm is about 2 inches shorter than the right. I've always had learning problems. I had to be put in special education classes in the second grade and had to have those classes up until i dropped out of high school after failing the 11th grade. I've always found it difficult to retain information. I do however, have a socially acceptable level of competence. I am articulate, play guitar, played baseball to great success (made all-stars every year) and I can draw exceptionally well. I get along just fine socially.
I have not been to see any doctors and/or dentists since I was 15. My dental hygiene has been going downhill for the past few years. Now it's to the point where I don't even want to smile, especially on a job interview. I tried my best throughout my life to not accept that there was something different about me. I've worked in multiple labor intensive jobs. Never could seem to hold them for very long. My employment track record isn't very flattering, to be honest. My entire family has always been very frustrated with me due to me not being able to hold jobs and fend for myself. It's lead to some drag out screaming matches sometimes. I'm kind of the black sheep in the family, whom I still live with. These days, I can't land a job to save my life. Interviews always seem to go pretty well, but it never pans out. I know my employment history probably is an issue, but i'm certain that me limping out of their office after the interview doesn't help either.
I don't know what to do. I'm going nowhere in life. I'm at my wits end, as is my family. I'm so lost and confused with no direction or help. I've been severely depressed for the past few years of my life. My physical condition has always bothered me to some degree throughout my life but i have always been such a happy and outgoing person. Not so much these days, I don't really talk to any of my friends anymore, i feel like a shell of my former self. Also, My mom passed right in front of me unexpectedly due to a blood clot and it bothers me immensely. I think I may need counseling for it, I find myself thinking about that entire day, her face, everything we talked about that day. I just can't help it. She was also quite disappointed with me and all my failings in life. It just hurts so bad that I couldn't make her proud of me in her lifetime and since she died I haven't made any improvements.
I think the best step for me, at this point, is to get diagnosed. I've been denied medicaid once already. I'm going to try to appeal it. Until I get health coverage and get a diagnosis, I don't see my situation getting any better. In essence, My life is in shambles... Sorry for the great wall of text, but i want to be as clear as possible with my situation. Any advice, possible solutions and/or thoughts are welcome.