Discussions By Condition: I cannot get a diagnosis.

What is wrong with him mad or...bad

Posted In: I cannot get a diagnosis. 2 Replies
  • Posted By: Anonymous
  • November 2, 2006
  • 04:02 PM

My husband and I been married 3o years and has been drinking heavily for the last 20. Last Xmas I noticed his reactions very slow sleeping and drinking a lot. He started an affair with a Chinese escort girl half his age and said that the minute he met her that was the one for him. His behaviors have really strange not sleeping drinking and he has taken on a Chinese persona and is totally obsessed with her. We lived in South East Asia though I have returned to Scotland. He changes his feelings all the time and cannot decide what he wants his mind was racing at one point and you could see his brain move. He had a small breakdown at work and is unable to take resposibilty for even paying bills or anything. I took him back for 7 weeks he drank and mentally abused me telling me he hated me each drinking heavily and cold-heartily has returned to her. His personiality has changed calling me dear and yet he texts her with cruel descriptions me the old wife. He says he cannot understand it himself. Is it the drink- he collapsed when under emotional pressure for a few minutes he had been drinking but woke up not like an alchol collapse. He got treated for depression though did not tell the doctor everything. I also noticed 3 or 4 times a day he gleefully rubs his hands on his face gleefully or euphorically. He has given up all friends in SCotland and does not mix or seem interested only Chinese people and things. Please advise any possible reasons or is it the drink?

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2 Replies:

  • Heavy drinking can have very bad outcomes, it is VERY possible that his change in behavior is due to his heavy drinking. What he needs is to stop drinking or he will completely ruin his life. He can't treat his depression if he doesn't treat his drinking problem first, and believe me, the depression HAS to be due to his drinking or at least it's a big part of it. If he can't take charge and even pay his bills, i don't think he knows what he wants to do with his life and that must be why he is acting so erratically. My advice is to either talk to him about his problem or just get him some help yourself if you still want to give him a chance, if he doesn't want help maybe it would be best you let him go, maybe the chinese will take care of him ;]
    the_one 39 Replies
    • November 2, 2006
    • 05:02 PM
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  • Sounds like serious alcohol abuse problem with a possibility of bipolar. I can relate I was with a man that was a wolf in sheep's clothing when I met him. He was kind. But when I got to know him he turned into satan himself. I know part of his problem was alcohol. But even when he wasn't drinking he would be physically and mentally abusive to me. He would say he didn't ever touch me though I would have blood pouring from my ear. I think he had bi-polar. Does he ever talk about quitting? The only bad thing is an alcoholic has to want to change their lifestyle or it is a waste of time to try and help him. Believe me I know. I have seen many people that went into rehabs for others and not themselves and came out and were worse than before. If I were you I think I would leave and go on with my life. Wish you the best of luck with all of this. It can be very ******n a victim. And only you can decide what is best for YOU. :)
    Dana77535 8 Replies
    • November 2, 2006
    • 05:37 PM
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