Discussions By Condition: I cannot get a diagnosis.

What's going on with me?

Posted In: I cannot get a diagnosis. 9 Replies
  • Posted By: Anonymous
  • October 17, 2006
  • 04:41 AM

About 6 months ago, at night, I started having what I would later learn to be "delusions." I'd be utterly scared of, well, hallucinating. I'd have a specific scenario set out in my mind of a hallucination, and I'd be extremely scared it would happen, that I'd have to call someone up and sit with the light on and talk to them for a couple hours before I was able to go to sleep. It wasn't late at night, around 9-10 ish, the normal time I'd go to bed. This happened a couple nights a week for a couple of weeks.

It subsided for a couple of months, but has recently come back. Now I lay awake at night with the light on and my music playing, trying to do anything to take my mind off my fear of hallucinating. More recently, I've started to see my walls / ceiling moving, just a tiny bit, usually when I breathe in and out. Just sort of get bigger / smaller, not moving as if they were alive or anything like that. Not only that, but I often get up out of my room because I feel like I hear a TV on somewhere, or some people talking outside, but upon further inspection, nothing is making the talking-noise, as if I am hearing voices. None of the conversations I hear are understandable, just the sound of people talking downstairs or on a TV in a different room.

The past couple nights, I'd be laying in my bed trying to absorb my brain in thoughts other than this irrational fear, and I'd hear my thought's outloud. And it would not be myself speaking them, or really anyone speaking them.

I have no idea what's going on. I was once diagnosed with depression and OCD, but both were mild. I told my doctor about these experiences a couple months ago, and he wanted to get me in to see a psychiatrist. The reason I disagree with that is because I already know this is an irrational fear. During the day I can reason through everything, and it sounds stupid when I think about it. But at night when this happens (and although it generally happens every night, but the severity differs drastically), I can't rationalize through it. It's more like an innate, unlearned fear, something I can't control. It's like I'm scared but I don't know why, and I've found hallucinations to be scared of, so whenever I get scared I blame it ont he hallucinations. I think that's the best way I can describe this. Anyone have any idea what in the world is going on??

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9 Replies:

  • Did you ever see a psychiatrist? If not, make an appointment. Even if you understand these are irrational feeling in the light of day, this needs to be addressed by a psychiatrist. If a GP diagnosed your depression and OCD, remember these are not their area of expertise.
    Anonymous 42789 Replies
    • October 17, 2006
    • 00:29 PM
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  • I have seen a psychiatrist and was diagnosed with bipolar with psychotic tendencies. I was not very happy, and refused to be put on lithium (the medication recommended) because I do not believe I exhibit bipolar tendencies, namely the manic phases. Additionally, I was under the impression lithium was a schitzophrenic medication? Anyhow, I was just posting to see what other opinions I might get, if any, and what additional information I might find out, whether speculation or relation to other cases. Thank you for the reply. :)
    Anonymous 42789 Replies
    • October 19, 2006
    • 04:58 AM
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  • Hello, I may have some ideas for you, as well as some suggestions. From what your describing I would already believe that you have developed some type of psychotic disorder. As for being manic depressive (bipolar disorder), in my opinion, I would criticize and question that diagnosis. Frankly, I have noticed fairly commonly that psychiatrists and psychologists will diagnose someone with being manic depressive just because they describe symptoms of feeling "happy" on some days and feeling "sad" on others, often cycling through the course of a day. The hallucinations you are describing are similiar to someone who would have had a large amount of frequent stress, often work or family related or is feeling lonely, and cast aside. I am not implying anything, I am simply suggesting by using references : ) Most commonly this would be associated with those types of life problems.Personally, I would be very cautious of taking any type of medication that alters your brain's chemicals. And if you choose to do so, be aware that you will most likely have to try different types for a few months until you find the one that works for you.If you and your psychiatrist come to the conclusion that you may be manic depressive, lithium has little side effects and one of the oldest and most effective ways to treat the disorder with hardly any side effects. But, everyone is different. I would NOT suggest taking Depakote, if your psychiatrist recommends that drug. It may even make your symptoms worse and less aware of your surroundings (thats what they give the elderly in nursing homes to calm them down). And if you and your psychiatrist believe that you have a psychotic disorder. I would suggest requesting a drug called Risperdal. Risperdal is a antipsychotic and is used for schizophrenia, as well as, manic depressive disorder. It is a rather light drug and it has very little and weak side effects and is rather effective. It will help you calm down and sleep easier at night. And if you feel you need something to help you sleep, ask your psychiatrist about these drugs. Klonopin (clonazepam), Ativan (lorazepam), Rozerem, or Lunesta. Klonopin and Ativan are narcotic benzodiazepines that have been on the market for some time, at low doses some people can find it very effective. If you are looking for something that is non-narcotic I would suggest Rozerem. As for Lunesta, it is in its own class of drugs, and fairly new with great results. Only side effect would be a rusty metal taste in your mouth that would last for the day. Well at least hopefully I gave you something to think about, especially the choices of prescription options if you do choose to take medication. Be cautious about the medications and what they do to you, ask for samples and research them online. :)Good-luck
    Anonymous 42789 Replies
    • October 19, 2006
    • 07:19 AM
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  • That sounds exactly like a friend of mine. She has the same problems you have and was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder. As long as she takes her medicine (Which does not alter her Mood or personality) She does fine. But if she ever stops her medication the problems come back again. If she is not on her meds she even has memory lapses. She also hated the idea of being bi-polar and having to be on meds all her life, but since she has gotten used to being "normal" she is very, very happy! If you do decide to get tested and are put on medicines, be patient, she had to go through several before she found one that worked well for her. Good Luck to you & best wishes:)
    leabrooke 4 Replies
    • October 19, 2006
    • 00:29 PM
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  • It sounds to me as though you have a physical problem associated with having too much dopamine in part of your brain. If the excess dopamine is in the part of the brain that affects hearing, you hear things-if in the part that affects seeing, you see things. Because dopamine is the nuerotransmitter that causes your nerves to understand you are hearing when there really is something to hear, it truly makes people hear things in the same way. It is not "imagining" that you hear something. You truly do. The same thing goes for seeing things. The problem is that they call this problem mental illness, which allows people to believe that you "imagine" things or that you don't deal well with stress. The reasons psych meds work for these problems is that the ones that help work specifically on the dopamine in the brain. A dopamine agonist. No one wants to hear that they have mental illness, but mental illness is usually a physical illness. Yes, some folks have issues, but many people with mental illness do not-they simply have chemicals or nerves in their brain that don't work correctly. They found out recently that the reason it takes an antidepressent to work so long is that it is actually growing new nerve cells in the brain. I say go to a really good psych doc and try not to get defensive. Good psych docs know this isn't about how you "feel" it is about how the chemicals in your brain make you feel. Good luck-oh, if this is bipolar disorder and is left untreated it will eventually get worse. The longer that you let it go untreated the worse it gets and the older you get, the worse it gets-I say treat early.
    Anonymous 42789 Replies
    • November 4, 2006
    • 10:53 AM
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  • Check out Hypnagogia in wikipedia.
    Anonymous 42789 Replies
    • November 9, 2008
    • 10:53 PM
    • 0
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  • Hello, I work as a case manager with persons with severe and persistant mental illness. A few observations from my work that may give you some comfort. My clients range from persons who had to drop out of school when they where in gradeschool to college graduates who had professional jobs. I don't believe there is anything rational about mental illness. True life stressors can bring on symptoms, but the thing to remember is that it is an illness that can be MANAGED with medication and cognative therapy. One of the many hard things are that with a mental illness everything is very real. You are hearing voices, you are broadcasting your thoughts, it's just no one else knows. It's not a life time death sentance. With the newer medications they have less side affects and after things settle down life will be different but you can still keep a good quality of life with a job, friends and family. I saw a psychiatrist for 5 years regarding my own mental illness and after being very resentfull and angry it all turned out OK and I feel much better now. Mental illness is still highly stigmatized, which is a shame. You don't see people ostrasizing persons with siezures or cerebal palsy do you? Your illness is no more under your control than theirs. Managing stress is a biggy so you might want to look into that as well as seeing a psychiatrist. It's even a good idea to see a few to compare and contrast if they will spend time talking to you or just see you for 5 mins and throw a prescription for meds at you. Also contact your local chapter of N.A.M.I. or National Alliance for the Mentally Ill near you for more information. Warmest Regards:)
    Anonymous 42789 Replies
    • November 9, 2008
    • 11:43 PM
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  • schizophrenia symptoms(i trully hope i`m wrong)
    Anonymous 42789 Replies
    • November 10, 2008
    • 03:48 PM
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  • Most, if not all, mental health symptoms have known physical causes. I think a vitamin B12 deficiency can cause hallucinations and other B-vitamins can cause depression and a magnesium deficiency can cause anxiety. If I were you, I'd look into physical causes first. You have to be assertive and persistent to get doctors to order necessary tests. It's also important to eat a healthy diet, get regular exercise, and take a multivitamin.One study I read found that almost half of the people in mental hospitals who were diagnosed with psychiatric diseases were actually suffering from a treatable physical disease that could be diagnosed with standard blood tests. A psychiatrist would probably just label you schizophrenic and recommend antipsychotic drugs without looking into any of the physical causes of your symptoms. I would only recommend it as a last resort if nothing else works and you need something to stop your symptoms.
    stanleybrown 29 Replies
    • November 10, 2008
    • 04:14 PM
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