Discussions By Condition: I cannot get a diagnosis.

Is It Over for Us

Posted In: I cannot get a diagnosis. 0 Replies
  • Posted By: Anonymous
  • March 10, 2010
  • 09:50 PM

I've been married for almost 13yrs. I've always felt like our marriage was a marriage of convience for my husband. He was a single father struggling to raise his daughter, who was barely a year old. While we were dating, he would always say he wanted someone who could take care of his daughter because he really needed help raising her. He proposed only after dating 3 months. I said no right away, but he continued to ask almost daily. I finally said yes and we were married 4 months later. I assumed the role of wife and mother, dropping off our daughter at the baby sitter, making sure the housework was done, running errands, etc. Whereas, my husband role minimized to just going to work. He stopped doing things around the house( mowing the lawn, taking out trash) and even stopped spending time with our daughter. Soon after we got married my husband started sleeping in another room. I felt it strange and when I approached him he said something in our room causes his asthma to act up. After months of sleeping alone I finally convinced him to return to our bedroom and he did. Over the years, he has continued to periodically sleep in another room and I can't seem to get a valid reason from him why he does it. We do have problems in or marriage(financial, sexual). He spends a lot of time in his room on his laptop. He locks the door so I can't easily walk in. We have not been intimate in over a year, and throughout our marriage it would be once every couple of months. As far as our financial situation goes, every month we seem to be balancing only a few hundred dollars in our checking account. Before we would have an ending balance of roughly 13 hundred. The only new fincial thing that we have taken on is giving our daughter a cell phone, which she never goes over on minutes. I cant seem to figure out where the few entra hundreds are going. He barely says two words to me anymore. When he does say something its "what's for dinner" or "can you walk the dog?" Everytime I try to talk about our problems he brushes it off as though their isn't a problem. I've suggested marriage counseling, but he refuses. We have one child together. I'm frustrated with our living situation. I don't feel like a married couple, I feel more like we're roommates. Is there any hope for our situation? Will we ever become a normal married couple, or is it over for us?

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