I hate going to the doctor to be honest and so I tend to put it off as much as possible. When I've had to be in the emergency room I've begged to leave. For years I've been having some problems seizure-like episodes, digestive problems, dryness (of the mouth, eyes, nose etc), joint pain, and some cognitive problems and I've spent a good time trying to figure it out on my own, too much time probably when I go to a doctor though I just want to find out and leave lol.
I've been to the doctor now to try in earnest and they've referred me to a variety of specialists and I figure it'll turn up normal, even though I don't feel right. I am worried I am looking for an excuse for not being able to function properly, even though I don't like not functioning properly if this makes sense.
I've just never been able to find out what the deal is in the past I worry I am wasting their time and mine. I am only just now about to get tested for the problems I actually thought it might be. I also worry its in my head, I've had many doctors who wouldn't listen at all in the past and its been very discouraging and I have hypochondriacs in my family. I like to study medicine, I don't think I have everything or anything, but I do see some of my problems in some conditions and some conditions freak me out. But is this still being a hypochondriac? How do you recognize psychosomatic illness? Can psychosomatic illness manifest into tangible things? How tangible exactly can it be? If this batch doesn't turn up any answers I think I will wait ten more years and see if I am still suffering, I feel they won't figure it out till I am half-dead anyways so. Do other people feel like this?
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