Discussions By Condition: I cannot get a diagnosis.

ANY help is appreciated as we cannot get any information from medical personnel!

Posted In: I cannot get a diagnosis. 3 Replies
  • Posted By: Anonymous
  • August 27, 2012
  • 10:05 PM

My 60 year old brother has been a closet drinker for 25+years. He has recently been in the hospital, and is currently in the nursing home because doctors have been draining 10 - 12 liters of liquid from his stomach every week. He has been mean and nasty to everyone for many years, and this is still continuing. My problem is that he has told all of his doctors that they cannot talk to any of his family members about his condition. Because of HIPA laws, we cannot get any information from medical personnel, so we do not know how close to the end stages of liver disease we are. I have read ALOT about psorosis of the liver, and I realize that his time on this earth is coming to a close. We have brothers and sisters that live out of country, and are planning a trip at Thanksgiving (4 months) .

My question is, what is the realistic time frame fro my brother -- should we be calling family members home before Thanksgiving, or will he realistically have more time with us? Do we start funeral preparations? I love my brother, and cannot get any information from medical staff, so I am at a loss ... am I premature with preparations? Do I prepare our 85 year old mother for the closure process ? ANY help, or even a realistic time frame for life on earth would be appreciated!!! Thanks!

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3 Replies:

  • Hi there. I don't have an answer but I do have a suggestion. I'm not sure how long this will take, but what about trying to get his rights taken away so that you would have them and the doctor's would have to talk to you and can tell you information. You can alway's say he's not stable for his health. Incase there is a cure and he deny's it. I wish you the best of luck
    lmc21787 2 Replies
    • September 8, 2012
    • 07:57 AM
    • 0
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  • I am so sorry that you are going through this situation. Other than the fact your brother is retaining fluid how is his skin? Does he have a yellow tinge to it? also late stage cirrhosis can cause massive bruising. In my opinion the fluid retention is due to his kidneys not liver, I had a friend that was a heavy heavy drinker he referred to himself as pickled he had the yellow skin red bulging eyes and was massive in size. He quit drinking had a few surgeries and now he is much better. Instead of planning his funeral focus on the positive he is in a safe place where he can't drink and has the medical attention that he needs. Trying to reason with an alcoholic is like talking to a brick wall if he isn't willing to talk about his condition just assure him that you and your family are there for him when he is ready. You said he was a closet drinker so maybe he is ashamed and that is why he is so hush hush about his health. I wish you the best.
    leslie6074 4 Replies
    • September 28, 2012
    • 05:43 PM
    • 0
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  • Maybe you should try having a heart to heart talk with him and persuade him that it'd be a good idea to appoint a famly member to have power of attorney. If someone has power of attorney they would be able to make decisions for him on his behalf if it became medically necessary. By having power of attorney it allows doctors to talk about his condition to the appointed person.
    Illumastorm 3 Replies
    • October 8, 2012
    • 08:25 PM
    • 0
    Flag this Response
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