Discussions By Condition: I cannot get a diagnosis.

19 years old, unknown cause to strange/scary brain problems PLEASE HELP!!

Posted In: I cannot get a diagnosis. 20 Replies
  • Posted By: mr. moore
  • January 29, 2009
  • 04:00 AM

:(hi im a 19 year old college student and ive been having these problems for years:
I can't seem to follow conversations anymore, and i can't mentally hush myself. I have constant colors in my vision, an "aura", like the northern lights, but more staticy, it's in the foreground in my vision, meaning i see the colors then the objects, this is because when i close my eyes it's most apparent, and when im in darkness.
I have this feeling as if im constantly day dreaming, or almost sleep walking. I can't seem to make objects i see and touch appear real. It's as if im awake, but my brain is asleep. I had an EEG and MRI done years ago and they thought i was having petit mal seizures, but then did it again and im not. I can do most tasks because ive done them so many times its muscle memory, but i can't learn new things anymore, literally all i can do is push carts at my local target and refuse any promotions. I don't enjoy reading anymore because i don't feel myself getting anything from it. Certain color patterns throw me off and make me feel even more "day dreamy", like the red and white patterns at Target, or checkered colors. Lights have halos around them and it's hard to drive at night because of brake lights in fron of me.
I'm anxious about going crazy and constantly have anxiety attacks, especially around people, who seem so animated and full of life, but mostly unpredictable. like i said, i can't take new sitations, so i stick around predictable ones, even though im always on edge because something might happen that i have to use my head for or something. I get very emotional over big things, but im like almost unresponsive to the point of having aspergers when it comes to people and little events like almost getting hit by a car.
I have terrible short term memory, and most things or events i can only remember from little "landmarks" in my memory. I can't multi task at all. I constantly feel asleep at the wheel. And yes, i get proper sleep.

Antianxiety drugs and adhd medications don't help me, but they did about6 or 7 years ago.

If it helps i was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder. I've been to many doctors. I went to the ER yesturday because of how intensely detatched i feel. I am currently on the anti depressant Luvox and clonopin, both of which do NOTHING!! i am in so much confusion im very scared. I am seeing my neurologist monday but it seems far away. im hoping someone can help me i fear im losing my mind. (schizophrenia has,unfortunately, been ruled out).:(

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  • :(hi im a 19 year old college student and ive been having these problems for years:I can't seem to follow conversations anymore, and i can't mentally hush myself. I have constant colors in my vision, an "aura", like the northern lights, but more staticy, it's in the foreground in my vision, meaning i see the colors then the objects, this is because when i close my eyes it's most apparent, and when im in darkness. I have this feeling as if im constantly day dreaming, or almost sleep walking. I can't seem to make objects i see and touch appear real. It's as if im awake, but my brain is asleep. I had an EEG and MRI done years ago and they thought i was having petit mal seizures, but then did it again and im not. I can do most tasks because ive done them so many times its muscle memory, but i can't learn new things anymore, literally all i can do is push carts at my local target and refuse any promotions. I don't enjoy reading anymore because i don't feel myself getting anything from it. Certain color patterns throw me off and make me feel even more "day dreamy", like the red and white patterns at Target, or checkered colors. Lights have halos around them and it's hard to drive at night because of brake lights in fron of me.I'm anxious about going crazy and constantly have anxiety attacks, especially around people, who seem so animated and full of life, but mostly unpredictable. like i said, i can't take new sitations, so i stick around predictable ones, even though im always on edge because something might happen that i have to use my head for or something. I get very emotional over big things, but im like almost unresponsive to the point of having aspergers when it comes to people and little events like almost getting hit by a car.I have terrible short term memory, and most things or events i can only remember from little "landmarks" in my memory. I can't multi task at all. I constantly feel asleep at the wheel. And yes, i get proper sleep. Antianxiety drugs and adhd medications don't help me, but they did about6 or 7 years ago. If it helps i was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder. I've been to many doctors. I went to the ER yesturday because of how intensely detatched i feel. I am currently on the anti depressant Luvox and clonopin, both of which do NOTHING!! i am in so much confusion im very scared. I am seeing my neurologist monday but it seems far away. im hoping someone can help me i fear im losing my mind. (schizophrenia has,unfortunately, been ruled out).:( Do you have any history of drug abuse? What is your family life like? Do you take any supplements and have you been tested for nutritional deficiencies? Vit B12, essential fatty acids, lecithin (soy or egg based) are all nutrients which may be helpful to you. I am not saying that nutritional deficiencies are the CAUSE of your problems, but they may be a contributing factor. Visit www.1stholistic.com and look up their list of vitamin/mineral deficiencies and their common symptoms. Do you remember when you started feeling this way? Was there any unusual incident that precipated the start of these feelings? Do you get headaches? DOM
    acuann 3080 Replies
    • January 29, 2009
    • 04:42 AM
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  • Do you have any history of drug abuse? What is your family life like? Do you take any supplements and have you been tested for nutritional deficiencies? Vit B12, essential fatty acids, lecithin (soy or egg based) are all nutrients which may be helpful to you. I am not saying that nutritional deficiencies are the CAUSE of your problems, but they may be a contributing factor. Visit www.1stholistic.com and look up their list of vitamin/mineral deficiencies and their common symptoms. Do you remember when you started feeling this way? Was there any unusual incident that precipated the start of these feelings? Do you get headaches? DOM thanks for responding quickly! i have a deskfull of vitamins and herbs ive taken and none have helped including this dissolving B12 stuff. i have never taken any illegal drug, ever.my family life is ok, i mean im always anxious though. ive gone on virtully every allergy or celiac disease diet. celiac disease doesn't even run in my family. ive done almost every alternative medical or otherwise thing and none have helped, including getting metal fillings removed. im afraid im going crazy, but the only crazy person in my family was schizo, my moms uncle and took medication and it helped him. ive alway had this problem but it's seemed to get significantly worse wheni had my tonsils taken out after 7th grade in 2001 but that's a guess. i mean ive ALWAYS been anxious but now i have a reason...
    mr. moore 30 Replies
    • January 29, 2009
    • 04:54 AM
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  • Have you tried lithium?
    aquila 1263 Replies
    • January 29, 2009
    • 05:08 PM
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  • hmm thanks but im done looking into alternative reasons and playing doctor house. i tried neurofeedback, and i thought that would help me. i tried gluten free diets allergy free diets ect. its no use. im seeing a neurologist monday because it's making me extremely depressesd and anxious (try living in a dream 24 7 and being afraid your gonna wake up as another person) so i think if i restate my problem to him he might better be able to help. thanks though... in any case does anyone know of any REAL problems that i could have?:(
    mr. moore 30 Replies
    • January 29, 2009
    • 11:03 PM
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  • Blaze:You're getting stranger and stranger!
    richard wayne2b 1232 Replies
    • January 30, 2009
    • 05:29 PM
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  • If you're bipolar,Luvox and Klonopin aren't the right drugs for you.Why aren't you on Seroquel or Abilify?
    richard wayne2b 1232 Replies
    • January 30, 2009
    • 05:34 PM
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  • thanks for responding quickly! i have a deskfull of vitamins and herbs ive taken and none have helped including this dissolving B12 stuff. i have never taken any illegal drug, ever.my family life is ok, i mean im always anxious though. ive gone on virtully every allergy or celiac disease diet. celiac disease doesn't even run in my family. ive done almost every alternative medical or otherwise thing and none have helped, including getting metal fillings removed. im afraid im going crazy, but the only crazy person in my family was schizo, my moms uncle and took medication and it helped him. ive alway had this problem but it's seemed to get significantly worse wheni had my tonsils taken out after 7th grade in 2001 but that's a guess. i mean ive ALWAYS been anxious but now i have a reason... That's fine...I actually didn't mention allergies, that's interesting that you tried allergy diets. How old were you when you had your amalgam's removed? I hope your neurologist will help you. Do you ever get headaches? Pain or pressure in your eyes? Sinus problems at all? DOM
    acuann 3080 Replies
    • January 30, 2009
    • 06:01 PM
    • 0
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  • Mr. Moore, I'm incredibly interested in your testimony. Granted, I don't have many of the symptoms you described, but key parts of your situation strike a personal cord within me. People/Doctors constantly ask me what's wrong, what am I experiencing, and I have the hardest time explaining it.Personally- I think this feeling has existed since high school, so we are looking at 9 years ago now, but I always had something else to blame it on- Stress of school, 4 hours of sleep, etc. Now everything's pretty ok, but it seems to be getting worse.I have the same detached sense of reality that you do. I describe the feeling as watching myself act from a third person perspective, or the feeling of nearly waking from a dream. I tried to describe the feeling as a headache, but its more of a pressure,or full-ness. This is of course accompanied by a constant fatigue and tiredness- Once again, I'm super healthy, vitamin loaded, getting 8 hours of sleep, living a pretty happy lifestyle, etc... (you know, all the questions people ask you at first?)The first doctor I went to about this jumped to brain tumor,the MRI came back clean- the next one jumped to depression and I have been on Lexapro 20mg doseage ever since. The pills don't seem to help the problem overall, but I admit that since I've been taking them, I have these moments of clarity where everything seems completely tangible, almost HYPER REALISTIC...it occurs randomly but I have a thought like- Wow, that wall is right next to me- and i kind of have the urge to touch it because I've felt detached for so long, the feeling of reality is comforting.The pressure and discomfort still follow me though, the drugs aren't really helping much. I don't get nearly as much enjoyment out of anything, I find myself fighting to keep memories of fun moments I am having because even while I'm enjoying them, I'm not really enjoying them because of the strange detachment.I don't know if my story has helped you at all (aside from mentioning a different psyche med), but I look forward to seeing what your Neurologist says...
    Anonymous 42789 Replies
    • January 30, 2009
    • 06:42 PM
    • 0
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  • Have you *really* tried "allergy diets" under the care of a dietician or doctor, or did you just stop eating bread, pasta etc. on your own? There is a really big difference. People mistake "gluten free" with looking for "flour" on food labels, but gluten is in many products, even ice cream. Get help to do this if you haven't already done so.
    aquila 1263 Replies
    • January 30, 2009
    • 08:34 PM
    • 0
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  • um im getting the amalgams out in a week. i have a slight pressure in my head. my mom found what's wrong with me on the internet, something like "persistant auro without infaction" or something. i dunno. but i basically am walking around in an almost dreamlike state and it's killing my social life, academic life, sex life, life...in general.
    mr. moore 30 Replies
    • January 30, 2009
    • 09:43 PM
    • 0
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  • Mr. Moore, I'm incredibly interested in your testimony. Granted, I don't have many of the symptoms you described, but key parts of your situation strike a personal cord within me. People/Doctors constantly ask me what's wrong, what am I experiencing, and I have the hardest time explaining it. Personally- I think this feeling has existed since high school, so we are looking at 9 years ago now, but I always had something else to blame it on- Stress of school, 4 hours of sleep, etc. Now everything's pretty ok, but it seems to be getting worse. I have the same detached sense of reality that you do. I describe the feeling as watching myself act from a third person perspective, or the feeling of nearly waking from a dream. I tried to describe the feeling as a headache, but its more of a pressure,or full-ness. This is of course accompanied by a constant fatigue and tiredness- Once again, I'm super healthy, vitamin loaded, getting 8 hours of sleep, living a pretty happy lifestyle, etc... (you know, all the questions people ask you at first?) The first doctor I went to about this jumped to brain tumor,the MRI came back clean- the next one jumped to depression and I have been on Lexapro 20mg doseage ever since. The pills don't seem to help the problem overall, but I admit that since I've been taking them, I have these moments of clarity where everything seems completely tangible, almost HYPER REALISTIC...it occurs randomly but I have a thought like- Wow, that wall is right next to me- and i kind of have the urge to touch it because I've felt detached for so long, the feeling of reality is comforting. The pressure and discomfort still follow me though, the drugs aren't really helping much. I don't get nearly as much enjoyment out of anything, I find myself fighting to keep memories of fun moments I am having because even while I'm enjoying them, I'm not really enjoying them because of the strange detachment. I don't know if my story has helped you at all (aside from mentioning a different psyche med), but I look forward to seeing what your Neurologist says... yeah i am too. my mom found this thing, its a kind of rare stroke or something i dunno...but it seems like the one thing that makes sense.
    mr. moore 30 Replies
    • January 31, 2009
    • 03:54 AM
    • 0
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  • Hey, I'm 20, and have experienced some of what you are talking about. I was diagnosed young with OCD and Tourette's Syndrome. Eventually, i also was diagnosed with severe anxiety attacks as well as depression. Granted i felt like crap before being medicated, i noticed myself having that "disconnected" feeling you are describing when i was on Zoloft. It led to severe palpatations, as well as different pupil dilations, and a mess of other things. It wasn't until I did some research and talked with my GP that i discovered i was having some kind of adverse effect from the drug. It took a little while to get out of my system, but I was prescribed Xanax instead, and i have been able to function 100% better. I don't know if this same scenario could possibly apply to you, but i figured it was worth bringing to your attention since you are also on similar drugs. Hope things work out for you!
    wantsanswers 22 Replies
    • January 31, 2009
    • 05:15 AM
    • 0
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  • Hey, I'm 20, and have experienced some of what you are talking about. I was diagnosed young with OCD and Tourette's Syndrome. Eventually, i also was diagnosed with severe anxiety attacks as well as depression. Granted i felt like crap before being medicated, i noticed myself having that "disconnected" feeling you are describing when i was on Zoloft. It led to severe palpatations, as well as different pupil dilations, and a mess of other things. It wasn't until I did some research and talked with my GP that i discovered i was having some kind of adverse effect from the drug. It took a little while to get out of my system, but I was prescribed Xanax instead, and i have been able to function 100% better. I don't know if this same scenario could possibly apply to you, but i figured it was worth bringing to your attention since you are also on similar drugs. Hope things work out for you!im sorry tourettes is a terrible condition. that detatched feeling is not drug induced, and it's funny, it's at its WORSE when im not on prescription drugs. so...its actually not funny. im a point in my life where i can't plan anything or seemingly interact with other humans on a human level...im stuck in my own head. i hope the neurologist helps. this is what made me try to kill myself back in july.
    mr. moore 30 Replies
    • January 31, 2009
    • 07:00 PM
    • 0
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  • i am extremely sorry to hear that. I have anxiety disorder, and when i was looking online, i stumbled across something that sounded similar to your condition. The person called it "Depersonalization Anxiety"-a severe state of anxiety when you start feeling detached and unable to function. Possibly stating these symptoms to a Psychiatrist may help you, many cases people are prescribed anti-depressants, but alone they don't do the trick. The doctor may prescribe alprozolam (xanax) or another anti-anxiety drug in conjunction with your anti-depressant to see if there is any improvement. The two drugs affect different parts of your brain, so it may be worth mentioning. Alot of people, including myself, experience severe anxiety symptoms and aren't always aware of it. Since you said (in your first post) that you feel anxious, it may be a step in the right direction. Again, not sure if it will help, but GOOD LUCK AT THE NEUROLOGIST IN THE MEAN TIME. Hope you get better :)
    wantsanswers 22 Replies
    • February 1, 2009
    • 08:03 AM
    • 0
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  • i am extremely sorry to hear that. I have anxiety disorder, and when i was looking online, i stumbled across something that sounded similar to your condition. The person called it "Depersonalization Anxiety"-a severe state of anxiety when you start feeling detached and unable to function. Possibly stating these symptoms to a Psychiatrist may help you, many cases people are prescribed anti-depressants, but alone they don't do the trick. The doctor may prescribe alprozolam (xanax) or another anti-anxiety drug in conjunction with your anti-depressant to see if there is any improvement. The two drugs affect different parts of your brain, so it may be worth mentioning. Alot of people, including myself, experience severe anxiety symptoms and aren't always aware of it. Since you said (in your first post) that you feel anxious, it may be a step in the right direction. Again, not sure if it will help, but GOOD LUCK AT THE NEUROLOGIST IN THE MEAN TIME. Hope you get better :) yeah thats what i told my therapist 3 years ago when we started. but now my vocabulary is better, plus im more insightfull, and it turns out the little things are whats turning heads, like the colors i see in darkness, the constant music i my head...stuff like that. my theory is that clumped together, my experience is so confusing and nerve wrecking that im probably depersonalized all the time because of it. in fact im sure of it, because the very idea of depersonalization is mental escape. (i used to be a psych. major)
    mr. moore 30 Replies
    • February 2, 2009
    • 02:17 AM
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  • Seeing ''colors inthe dark''and ''music in my head''are hallucinations and imply a serious mental disease.You need to be on antopsychotics.Now!
    richard wayne2b 1232 Replies
    • February 2, 2009
    • 11:42 AM
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  • It's obviously antipsychotics.
    richard wayne2b 1232 Replies
    • February 2, 2009
    • 11:44 AM
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  • obviously, huh? do you know how many doctors ive been to? antipsychotics were used WAY back in 07, to now avail. actually, when i was on seroquel i went a little nuts and punched out my dad. so i doubt that.
    mr. moore 30 Replies
    • February 2, 2009
    • 06:01 PM
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  • Hey Mr moore I dont you know if you still read this but I sure would love to chat with you about this. I think I might have something similar going on with what you are experiencing.
    ecko23 51 Replies Flag this Response
  • Hummm....well you are most surely depersonalizing, but depersonalizing can be caused by numerous conditions. I have a dissociative disorder (DID), and i've worked in the health care field all my career. I'm a Respiratory therapist/Polysomnographer (I do sleep studies). My DID & my history in the health care both contribute to depersonalization.Interesting thing about sleep...all persons that suffer from mental health issues have sleep issues also. But sometimes it's difficult to discern which came first...the chicken or the egg ( I know it's the chicken, but that's beside the point). Sleep can be an incognito adversary. It's often the last thing considered. Might be a subject worth taking a peek at. If one has a sleep disorder, that needs to be resolved before pursuing the treatment of other issues, or you'll go nowhere fast. Hoping this might help.
    Linda5072 9 Replies Flag this Response
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